Celebrate the birth of baby Jesus with a pooing CR9 statue…
Christmas in the Catalan region of Spain is a joyous occasion. People spend days painstakingly recreating replicas of the nativity scene, which are proudly displayed in the run up to Christmas Day.
But when friends and family gather round to look at the handiwork, no-one is particularly bothered about the nativity bit — they’re all looking for a discreetly-placed gnome (or Caganer, “pooper”), like the one above, taking a sly shit somewhere.
Gaffer is ‘concerned about the mental state’ of Irish trio…
Hull’s Irish trio Paul McShane, Kevin Kilbane and Stephen Hunt would’ve cut depressing figures today, having returned to the club’s training ground. With so many players involved in Handball-gate, The Spoiler would have thought Tigers boss Phil Brown would be waiting with open arms, ready to provide a shoulder to cry on.
But (not for the first time) we’d be wrong. Instead, the three were told to go and get their heads checked by a psychologist in time for Saturday’s clash with West Ham. According to the Daily Star, a club source said:
[Sports psychologist Mark] Nesti can help them prepare for games and be mentally ready. Such a massive disappointment can take its toll and be hard to overcome. So it is important to find out what sort of place they are in.
The fallout from that night in Paris continues.While some have accepted it as one of football’s great injustices (and the ensuing drama/debate as part of the reason we all love sport so much), others have chosen to self-medicate in the warm, comforting arms of conspiracy theory.
Damien Duff is part of the latter camp. Talking to reporters from a shadowy car-park alcove, the Fulham winger revealed the World Cup 2010 playoffs have been orchestrated by a higher power, made up of German sportswear giant Adidas, the French Football Federation and Michel Platini:
Do I think it’s a conspiracy? Definitely. FIFA want the big teams in the World Cup, they want France in the World Cup, and it may sound silly but they want teams sponsored by adidas. Adidas sponsor the World Cup, they sponsor France. Michel Platini has a lot of influence as well.
Maybe we’d have had a better chance of going to the World Cup if it was sponsored by Umbro.
Hilariously, The Sun point out, in his rage Duff seems to have forgotten, as well as his weekly pay packet from Fulham, he gets paid a £100,000 a year to wear football boots made by … Adidas.
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The Daily Mail are claiming Premier League clubs have been leaving the well-being of their multi-million pound stars in the hands of a Serbian housewife who locals describe as ‘looking like Morticia Addams’.
Since her cover was blown by Robin van Persie on Tuesday, Mariana Kovacevic has gone into hiding, leaving the world’s press (and Serbian health officials, who have no record of this horse-guts operation existing) camped outside her clinic in New Belgrade, waiting for her to get back:
Within five minutes of each other Arsenal’s Van Persie left in one direction, while Liverpool pair Glen Johnson and Fabio Aurelio arrived from the other. By last night it appeared that Kovacevic may have already moved her placenta supplies and massage table elsewhere.
Legal battle dishes dirt on footballer’s ridiculous spending habits…
A court battle between ex-Newcastle striker Obafemi Martins and his former management company has revealed he was regularly skint … despite earning £75,000 a week.
NVA Management, who are suing for £300,000, have accused the “25-year-old” of regularly drawing out £40k on the weekends then taking another £25k on Monday mornings — leaving himself continually overdrawn.
According to the Daily Mail, a lawyer representing NVA claims Martins was also too lazy to bother chasing up sponsorship deals, meaning his name and image were being used without him receiving any coin: