England Protesters

Anti-Capello protests at FA headquarters


The Spoiler meets the patriotic front at Soho Square

Earlier today, The Spoiler was alerted to a huge fuss being made down at Soho Square. A mass of xenophobic yobs were said to be protesting at the FA’s decision to put another foreign manager in charge of the national side.

Naturally, we ran down as fast as we could, taping up jewellery and getting ready to windmill in, all in the name of professional journalism. Yet when we arrived, we found just a timid 70-year-old gent named Ray, an ex-Policeman whose biggest complaint was that it cost him £60 to come down from Birmingham.


The protestor, dressed in a John Bull uniform, has been campaigning outside FA headquarters since 8am this morning, and will be back on Monday to confront Brian Barwick over the ‘national disgrace’ of hiring another foreign coach.


After Ray had finished waving flags and signs to Garth Crooks and a Sky Sports News presenter, he spoke to The Spoiler about his concerns for the national side and the domestic game. After venting his disgust over having a manager from mainland Europe, he revealed his preferred candidate for the England job was Martin O’Neill. Who is from Northern Ireland. Second on the list was Mark Hughes. Who is from Wales. He also didn’t hesitate to suggest that Harry Redknapp was ‘framed’ by his former employer, the Police.

Note: After a little research, it turns out that Ray is actually a professional moaner, who will turn up at any occasion where the sovereignty of the Kingdom is called into question. He was outside the FA building when Sven was appointed, he mourned the end of Rover production at Longbridge, and he frequently bitches about Labour policy outside parliament. He gave The Spoiler his card, and if you would like to hire Ray for any occasion (weddings, Bar Mitzvahs, BNP rallies), send us an email or leave a comment.

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