Quote of the day

Gareth Southgate demonstrates a keen understanding of international football

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But a poor grasp of the English language

When asked for a comment concerning Fabio Capello’s appointment in today’s Guardian, Gareth Southgate revealed a subconscious hatred of all things foreign:

“I don’t understand the point of international football if the manager, coach, kit man, etc are not all English [...]

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Fabio Capello Madness

Fabio Capello forces hairy England stars into the salon

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Potential new England gaffer prefers the ‘smooth’ look

Slightly-eccentric-right-wing manager Fabio Capelli added to his huge stockpile of hilarious quotes in The Sun today:

“When a gentleman crosses his legs and the trouser leg rides up to show hairy shins, it offends my eyes. It’s like

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Danielle Lloyd

Danielle Lloyd ruins great building

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It was fine when she stuck to Movida and ‘whites

The Royal Albert Hall – home of the second largest pipe organ in the land, opened in 1871, famous for the Proms, dedicated to the loyal husband of Queen Victoria. And now eternally smudged by the presence of Danielle [...]

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Right wing coach

Fabio Capello is a fascist sympathiser

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Prospective England boss is worse than Walt Disney

When Glenn Hoddle aired his unusual views concerning reincarnation, he was quickly lambasted and removed from his post. So it’s probably best that Fabio Capello has put his socially unacceptable opinions out in the open before taking the reins.

Today’s

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A WAG Scorned

Thierry Henry destroys another relationship

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Footballer could have sparked the divide between Basketball WAG Eva Longoria and her hubby

Obviously not contented with the dissolution of his own marriage, Thierry Henry is reported to be aiding his friends in their extra-marital affairs.

As a guest at the fancy summer wedding of Desperate Housewife Eva [...]

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Crime on Merseyside

Alex Curran confronted by the Liverpool burglars

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Does the WAG hold the key to the pilfering mystery?

Jack The Ripper, the Zodiac murders, the sandwich that was stolen from the Spoiler’s fridge last week – all unsolved crimes that have dominated the agendas of law enforcement officers the world over.

The latest mystery to plague their [...]

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