Gazza to make glorious return to football management!
Despite possessing a questionable state of mental health, a low quality tabloid has linked the man who drunkenly gave me a tenner on my tenth birthday (true story) with a managerial job in the Philippines. Frankly, there’s a better chance of Jermain Defoe declaring a vow of abstinence, but the rest of today’s rumours have a little more substance…
Paul Gascoigne to the Phillippines
The seldom-reliable Daily Star claim that The Phillippines want to ‘rescue’ Gazza by making him the manager of their national team. There must be logic in that idea somewhere but we’re not going to bother guessing what it is.
The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Ludicrous idea if true
David Bentley to Everton
Bentley’s bold transfer request might not have panned out as he intended it to. It’s not Liverpool and Chelsea throwing pound notes at him to seduce him, it’s Aston Villa and Everton.
The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: We still expect Chelsea to make a move
Ronaldinho to LA Galaxy
Forget about Barcelona, forget about Chelsea, hell, even forget about Manchester City. Despite only being 28, Ronaldinho is going to take the money and join David Beckham in Hollywood.
The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Oh wait, it’s just a Daily Star story
Jo not to go to Manchester City
It has emerged that Jo may be owned by MSI, those bad guys who left us bored to tears over Tevezgate last summer, so he may be blocked from joining Mark Hughes’ revolution.
The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Not all this again, please
Milan Baros to West Ham
Fans were bored of Curbishley signing injured ex-Newcastle players so brought in a transfer guru, Gianluca Nani, who has identified Milan Baros, the striker yet to score in 2008, as the number one target.
The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Surely not
Colin Kazim-Richards to Hull
Once the Fenerbahce forward has fired Turkey to Euro 2008 glory he’s going to trade in Champions League football for sunny Hull and a dream partnership with Dean Windass.
The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Not as crazy as it sounds