Should fans also be allowed to change teams during the transfer window?
Men with tempers, stop reading now…
It’s that heady time of summer when the transfer window edges open, and swathes of footballers are given permission to seek a better life away from whatever Siberian/Spanish/Newcastle Hell-hole they’ve been rotting in for the last few years. They get to negotiate sparkling new deals, cast off the cobwebs and move happily into a new chapter of their great lives. So why can’t football fans?
Why can’t the simple man on the street renegotiate his allegiance to, say, Wigan, and head off to the shops to buy himself a bright red Man United jumper, politely inform his family and friends that he now wants to be known as “Red Phil” as opposed to “Wigan Phil”, and then spend next season getting into fights over Wayne Rooney, all the while enjoying some actual joy in his life for the first time. Possibly ever. Is it too much to ask? Is it?
After all, it has been done before. Remember the Three Tenors? Famously there was big fat Pavarotti, the Carreras guy, and then the other one. Well, it turns out that the other one was a fantastic singer called Placido Domingo, known for the dramatic tone of his voice. And also famous for openly switching his allegiance from Real Madrid to Barcelona, and then, a couple of years later, back to Real Madrid again. All without breaking a sweat.
Even Tim Lovejoy (pictured, in orange), a huge Chelsea fan, used to openly support Watford when he was just a kind voice on the radio. If someone cool and happening like him can change his team, then why the Christ can’t you?
So during this break (i.e. this opening of the transfer window) The Spoiler would like to suggest an amnesty, a time of peace, where each man can (if he wants to) cast aside his mid-table team, and adopt a top four side. All without any bloodshed or cruel words from his colleagues/family/friends/wife. Then, and only then, he might have something to smile about in 2009.
Is this not a global village now anyway? Aren’t we all secretly from Manchester?
What say you, the people?
NEXT WEEK: why can’t we all just marry our cousins?