Sexytime

Carlos Tevez thinks he could be an underwear model

Handsomely-impaired striker wants to be more like Beckham et al

Carlso Tevez

Despite the new season being just over a week away, there is relatively little exciting news going on in the mainstream press. Accordingly, The Sun today ran a full page detailing how Carlos Tevez is convinced he could be an underwear model like David Beckham and Freddie Ljunberg, but admits he is let down by the fact that he looks like a big wet dog. Is this story really worthy of our attention? Couldn’t anybody be an underwear model if they, well, looked like an underwear model?

The best part of the non-story, however, is the weak grasp Carlos Tevez holds on what it takes to advertise pants in a homoerotic nature:

“I don’t have the same marketable image as a Ronaldo or a Lionel Messi.”

Yes, you read that correctly, he aspires to look like countryman Leo Messi, the same gentleman whose sexy poses made this ‘lingerie’ look less appealing than a night out with Craig Bellamy.


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