What’s that? Owen Hargreaves NOT going to the World Cup?
“Sorry lads, I’m going to have to duck out – cheers!”
One debate that definitely hasn’t been raging for the last few months has been whether Owen Hargreaves will go to the World Cup or not. And yet, as reported in the Daily Mail, the midfield pest still thought it worth pointing out that, actually guys, he won’t be ready.
It’s a move known in the trade as “getting in there first”, or, quite commonly, “the unnecessary sword fall” – also a popular technique amongst appalling members of the workforce who want to save face from sacking by handing in their resignation, or husbands in malfunctioning marriages who want to create the illusion that they can’t be tied down by divorcing the very woman that they adore.
Anyway, obviously forgetting that he doesn’t pick the squad, nor does he appear to play football anymore, Hargreaves has spoken to Capello, and it’s been decided that he won’t be available in June. The phone call, presumably, went something like this:
“Hi Fabio, it’s Owen…”
“Oh, hello Michael.”
“No, Owen Hargreaves… I’m afraid I won’t be able to play in the World Cup.”
“Sorry – who is this?”
“Owen.”
“Oh, hello Michael.”
(Repeat to fade)
Similar “count me out” calls are now expected from Phil Neville, Darius Vassell, Gazza, Woodgate, and Joe Cole.
Oooh hang on, someone just said Joe Cole – contentious!
3 responses so far
Pigletto // March 1, 2010 at 8:32 pm
Er, I’m sorry. Did you forget that Owen Hargreaves was the best player England had the last WC? Who has scored more penalty kicks in the last major competitions -Lampard? Gerrard? Becks? Nooo, they all choked. Time to get your head out of your ass, forget your Xenophobia (for those that can’t understand big words – a dislike and/or fear of that which is unknown or different from oneself) and appreciate a true talent.
El Pato // March 3, 2010 at 10:10 pm
Duhhhhh…
Pigletto, judging by your self-proclaimed knowledge of fabulously long words I am surprised you don’t understand the joke.
James T // March 4, 2010 at 12:38 pm
Whoever wrote this article is a CUNT! Why don’t you phone the office and tell them you don’t want to write for them anymore. Idiot!
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