News in Brief

Hull scrap frightens grannies, Cup Final fury, and Robinho…

“Soz”

Phil Brown 

Of course, probably the most baffling story of the day concerns the missing body of the soul/funk legend, James Brown. Apparently, it’s vanished. Everyone has been freaking out, some unable to work through the worry of it all, others playing The Payback (after the jump) over and over again in an attempt to dance the weirdness away. Where the hell is he?

Anyway, one small group who have something very much in common with ”the hardest working man in showbusiness” are the hardest working men/women in journalism – the football writers. Here’s what we know today, thanks to The Daily Mail, The Sun, The Telegraph, The Mirror etc…

Phil Brown has been forced to apologise to some startled members of the Women’s Institute, who happened to be wandering past a beautiful public park, just as Jimmy Bullard and Nick Barmby decided to have a scrap. Not since the war had the doddering old ladies seen so many telegraphed lunges and brutal karate chops. Brown said this:

“I’d like to apologise to the Women’s Institute, I didn’t realise there was a rally going on there and there was apparently 50-100 women going on a march across the Humber Bridge and the incident was unsavoury, it was unfortunate.”

“It happens on the training ground on a regular basis, under the control of the club, but it seems to have got out this time.”

In other news, the men in shirts and suit trousers who stomp around at ITV have ruffled a few feathers by attempting to move the FA Cup final from its traditional 3pm kick-off to something closer to 5.30pm. Needless to say, everyone is livid about this. Particularly Malcolm Clarke of the Football Supporters Federation, who said this:

“It would be hugely unpopular with supporters and would damage the famous competition.

“There are already too many evening kick-offs and supporters are suffering just to keep TV companies happy.”

And apparently Robinho wants to stay at Santos.

Here’s James Brown, as promised…


1 response so far
  • SPOT // March 12, 2010 at 7:57 pm

    Great music thanks for setting it up!

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