Sale now on!

Miss World, Mr Universe… it’s time to meet Mr West Ham!

Scott Parker, ladies and gentlemen!

Scott Parker

Possibly the most disturbing turn of phrase ever featured on Big Brother came in last year’s series, when one of the now forgotten inmates revealed that she wasn’t a “suck arse”. As conjured images go, it’s about as revolting as they come. And yet, her point was valid. No one likes a teacher’s pet… or, at least, we hope that’s what she meant. 

Hence, it will surely be a rather trying few weeks for Scott Parker over at West Ham, as his teacher’s pet status was confirmed by the club’s owner, David Sullivan. He said this (as reported in the Daily Mail):

“If we get the right bid we will sell any player, apart from Parker.”

“He is not for sale and has several years left on his contract, intimating on several occassions that he wants to stay.”

“He is Mr West Ham.”

Words which will surely come as a bit of a shock to the England contingent of Robert Green, Matthew Upson, and Carlton Cole. Not to mention Mark Noble, who probably thought that he was Mr West Ham.

Anyway, for the right money, they’re all off. But where should they go?

Let us know with a comment. 

3 responses so far
  • Cole // April 27, 2010 at 9:52 am

    Carlton Cole’s attitude is poor and Upson & Green have been shadows of their former selves and have clearly wanted to move on for some time. Well done Gold and Sullivan. If any of the players want to stay and play for the shirt that’s fine, if not move on for what they’re worth and we can rebuild.

  • cOL // April 27, 2010 at 11:06 am

    Cole, Upson and Green can go, I’m happy with getting them off the payroll to start reducing the debt but I would be sorry to see Noble, Stanislas, Collison, Ilan, Ilunga and Tomkins go to be honest and I would also welcome with open arms the loss of Kovac and Behrami not forgetting Mido, and Mcarthy.

  • matt // April 27, 2010 at 11:37 am

    Carlton Cole has played his way out of the WC squad since coming back from injury, being relatively ineffective and sulking his way through games.

    I can see Upson staying. He’s relatively old, costly in wages (earns about 70k a week currently), and the fact is that he actually isn’t very good. The Hammers have needed a leader all season and alas the only one we have had is Scott Parker. Presumably Upson will be looking at top 10 clubs to move to, and he either isn’t good enough to play for them or the clubs already have ample quality at centreback.

    I’ll be sad to see Green leave, if he has a good WC he’ll have his pick of the lot (Arsenal maybe?). Same goes for Behrami.

    Illunga can go because despite a good first season, he’s a bottler. McCarthy, Mido and Kovac should be let go as well. Spector is pretty awful too. Dyer should do the decent thing and leave, but also give back half his wages. It’s not his fault, but the minutes played:wage ratio for him must be mental!

    I agree that the youngsters should be held onto. I think it’ll be more interesting to see who is incoming, both in terms of manager and players

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