Joey Barton lives like a monk… who plays golf and likes horses
“So when we off to the golf course, lads?”
Well, the good news for everyone is that Joey Barton is now tee-total. That’s right, he doesn’t even touch the stuff. Because, if he did, within seconds he’d be bricking up phone boxes, and aggressively demanding bites of cheeseburgers from passers-by. No sir, that’s the old Joey Barton.
The new Joey Barton, it seems, has taken to eulogising about himself in the third person, whilst suggesting that he now lives the life of a holy man. On the downside, this doesn’t appear to include any kind of vow of silence. He spoke very freely about himself in today’s Daily Star:
“As a player, it’s been a tough year, but, as a person, it’s been a good one, a bloody good one.”
“I am quite happy with my life right now and the people involved in it and that will be great for Newcastle because a happy Joey Barton is a decent player.”
“Some people can handle their ale. I can’t do that.”
“The reason I can’t drink is because I cannot legislate for what is going to happen.”
“I don’t have responsibility for my actions when I drink and I can’t afford to make the same mistakes again.”
“Staying off alcohol keeps me out of places where you are likely to find trouble.”
“A wise man once said to me, ‘Keep going to the barbers and you’ll eventually get a haircut’. That’s true, so if I’m not out drinking in nightclubs, the risks of getting into bother are greatly reduced.”
“I live a monk-like existence flitting between the training ground and the golf course and have a bit of interest in horse racing.”
A hunch suggests that Joey doesn’t really have a clear picture of what monks actually do.
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