Breaking News!

Uh oh, “Gerrard to Real” is totally in the bag as well…

Imagine this, but with both of them in white

Gerrard and Alonso 

Oh dear, this will not go down too well, judging by the fury attracted when The Spoiler casually pointed out that Torres is probably going to Chelsea. But, here goes… deep breath. Steven Gerrard is DEFINITELY joining Real Madrid.

Make no mistake about it, The Spoiler is well connected, with secret squirrels deployed all over the country, rifling through bins, bugging boardrooms, smoking endless cigarettes as they jabber into payphones to avoid detection. And this comes from probably our top squirrel.

Exactly how many pesetas will be exchanged, no one can quite put a figure on it, but be certain of this: next season, Steven G will be sharing tiny little plates of spicy sausage with his old friend Xabi Alonso and their wives. Every damn weekend.


7 responses so far
  • Dan // June 29, 2010 at 12:47 pm

    Bad news, but he’s not getting any younger. If he wants to go I wish him every success, just as I did with Xabi.

    Just one question tho… how much 30m, 40m or even 50m?

  • Darren // June 29, 2010 at 1:21 pm

    “30m, 40m or even 50m”, lol

    Following his outstanding performances and inspired leadership at the World Cup – coupled with his advancing years – the dippers will be lucky to get £15m for him.

  • Nick // June 29, 2010 at 8:18 pm

    Liverpool would be getting a cracking deal if they could squeeze £30 million out of Real.

    The player is an all action midfielder whose whole game is based on dynamism, pace and stamina. Attributes which rapidly diminish when a player hits 30.

    Which Gerrard did last month.

    Darren’s got it right, £15 million is more realistic, although Real may stretch to 20 for a player whose best days are now behind him.

  • Polo // June 30, 2010 at 2:20 am

    20 million…and Gerrard is not denying this so its finally happening…

  • Chegs // June 30, 2010 at 10:49 am

    One of them will leave, not both. The Yanks would literally get tracked down and murdered if they sold both, especially after ousting Rafa

  • Dan // June 30, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    Cheers Darren, I’d take exception to your ‘dippers’ comment but it says more about you than me… So if Gerrards now worth 15m beacause of, as you put it ‘Following his outstanding performances and inspired leadership at the World Cup’ What’s Rooney worth? 20 bensons and a few cans of special brew? He was f**king useless – much worse than Gerrard!! By the way your hero’s a scouser… is he a dipper too?

  • haha ur all fake // July 22, 2010 at 1:51 pm

    fake fans talking bullshit…crappy site!

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