Joe Cole – the latest in a long line of Liverpool Cockneys
Liverpool, meet the new Jamie and Louise
After years of striding down the Kings Road shouting “oi oi!” at van drivers, Joe Cole can be excused for feeling rather discombobulated by the man in front of him at Anfield, coughing, snorting, hacking, sniffing, and clearing his throat.
But don’t worry, Joe, it’s just Jamie Carragher’s way of welcoming you to Liverpool Football Club.
That’s right, the big news today is that one half of Chelsea’s Cole Sisters has managed to correctly navigate himself through the exit, and into the arms of another big club.
Everyone expected London – specifically Spurs or Arsenal – but it seems that Joe wants to tread in the footsteps of great cockneys like Jamie “Jarhead” Redknapp, Razor Ruddock, Phil Babb, Glen Johnson, and presumably one or two others who have gone in search of a place where the streets are paved with standard issue concrete.
Joe leaves behind fond memories of crazy times in the capital with Lampsie and JT, weird evenings with Keeley Hazell that end in bloodshed, karaoke duets of “Sisters are doing it for themselves” with his namesake Ashley.
And whilst specific details of Cole’s new contract haven’t been revealed, he will presumably be able to keep his family in hot dinners and bubble baths, whilst his wife Carly takes time out from her lucrative personal training business to raise their child.
Liverpool fans – any thoughts about this?