Spoiler

Man City’s latest gun-for-hire, Fabregas update…

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As is usual at this stage of proceedings, the transfer curtains are quivering, but not much seems to be happening.

If the rumours are true, Mario Balotelli should be gracelessly tumbling through the window at any minute, before dusting himself down, and boarding the nearest bus full of grannies to take him to Manchester.

Speaking of City, whilst the expected millions are being chucked around, they’re coming to resemble more a gang of bounty hunters – like The Magnificent Seven - less so an actual football team – like Barcelona.

With growing whispers suggesting that the James Milner deal is cooling, the robed men might be wise to up their game to land their man – if only to have a player willing to collect up the balls at the end of practice, whilst the prima donnas mope back to the changing rooms, bickering.

In long-winded Arsenal/Barcelona news, Xavi has said something along the lines of Arsenal only having Fabregas on loan, until he finally returns home.

No doubt a sentiment shared by other clubs who have let players go, only to see them blossom elsewhere.

Ferguson will presumably be demanding Pique and Forlan back, Real Madrid will fly over to Italy to pick Sneijder up. And West Ham could even have a pop at reclaiming Mascherano, after his “loan” at Liverpool.

And in two word news:

Carvalho, Real.

Deco, Fluminense.

Neymar, nope.

Schwarzer, Arsenal.

Raul, Spurs.

That is all.

• Barcelona
• Fabregas
• man city
• Mario Balotelli
• transfers
• Xavi