Spoiler

The Sun’s five worst uses of Wayne Rooney’s surname…

…this month. We don’t want to be here all weekend.

The old adage ‘there’s a thin line between genius and insanity’ is nowhere more true than on the subs’ desk at The Sun, where they casually swing between supreme wordplay and genuinely terrible bastardisation of language, every day.

Let’s see what happens when Wapping’s finest are forced to pump out three stories a day about Wayne Rooney for a month straight.

5. Ferdy Is Lifted By Roo-turn

Rio celebrates Wayne’s decision to stay at Utd

4. Blue Roon

Man City are linked with a £40m bid for the striker

3. You Are Rooning Scared

Montenegro claim England are frightened, ahead of Euro 2012 qualifier

2. Get A Roon!

Wayne and wife Coleen are pictured hugging in a hotel swimming pool

1. Wayne to Alex: Don’t Be Crool

Wayne pleads for Fergie to keep playing him, despite his ‘ankle injury’

…

Basically; stop it, The Sun. Stop it.

(Unless they’re all as exquisitely shit as the last one.)

• The Sun
• Wayne Rooney