Stars Talking

8 reasons why England should host the World Cup… plus 2 why they shouldn’t

Kelly Brook – opinionated

Kelly Brook 

Famous faces have been out in force, throwing their rusty pennies into the mix to explain just why England should host the World Cup. Kelly Brook (above) was one of them. Find their moving tributes after the jump…

Simon Cowell

Reason: Because it would put an end to gang violence, and probably mean less divorces.

“I am pleased to join the campaign. To be given the chance to host the 2018 World Cup here would be fantastic and would unite the whole country.”

James Corden 

Reason: England wouldn’t require too many men in hard hats smoking roll ups using a thumb and forefinger pincer, whilst occasionally hammering nails into things. 

“We’ve already got so much in place with so many amazing stadiums but most of all we have an unrivalled passion for the game.”

Frankie Dettori

Reason: Local lad Frankie doesn’t fancy forking out on travel. 

“Football has always been a huge part of my life and so to be able to experience the world’s greatest football tournament in England would be incredible.”

Ray Winstone

Reason: Less awkward silences in village pubs. 

“Football binds communities together in every town, village and city in England.”

Phil ‘The Power’ Taylor 

Reason: Because no one watches darts. 

“I’m totally behind the bid. Football’s our national game and it would be an amazing event that would bring together the whole country.”

Kelly Brook

Reason: It distracts people from the depressing pointlessness of it all. 

“People always get really excited when major sporting events come here, which shows how important sport is to people across England.”

Marcus Trescothick 

Reason: Young people who haven’t heard of football will hear of football for the very first time. 

“In 2005, when we won the Ashes there was an influx of cricketers and it created a massive culture shift with youngsters wanting to play the game. The World Cup could do the same.”

Martin Johnson 

Reason: Something about “infrastructure”. 

“The England bid shows a huge amount of creativity, innovation and merit, which is complemented by a superb infrastructure.”

And the detractors…

Ruud Gullit

Reason: Free bikes in Holland!

“The compactness of our countries is a great asset. Due to the short distance the next game is never far away and we will offer the fans a network of free public transport and two million free bikes.”

Dennis Law

Reason: He’s from Scotland.

“I was on holiday when Euro 96 was played in England and my holidays for 2018 have been booked. I’m not interested in whether England get the World Cup finals.”


3 responses so far
  • TimTim // December 2, 2010 at 2:17 pm

    Last time you guys did something like this Real Madrid got battered. I hope you don’t jinx it this time with our bid. :-/

  • JoshBurt // December 2, 2010 at 3:33 pm

    I wish I had such powers TimTim

  • TimTim // December 2, 2010 at 4:30 pm

    Rumors that England bid crashed out in first round… I think you have to be careful Josh… your powers maybe there without knowing!

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