Transfer Talk

Chelsea fancy Modric, everyone fancies a Christmas Carroll…

On a side note, word has it that Pavlyuchenko still hasn’t quite got to grips with the intricacies of the English language and might yet be ushered off to have lessons from Peter Beardsley. We made the last bit up.

Anyway, yes, here’s more transfer news courtesy of all the best and worst papers…

Andy Carroll is further cementing his reputation as the vagrant’s Ibramimovic with both Man United and the giants at Real Madrid reportedly sniffing around attempting to lure him with the promise of free jager bombs, and, in Real’s case, the very real prospect of eating a lunch that consists of both sausages AND prawns during the same sitting.

The unsettling news in the capital is that Chelsea are preparing a package for Spurs man Modric, in a bid to find the perfect foil for Princess Frank in the middle of the park.

Landon Donovan looks set to enjoy his annual trip to Liverpool, to hang out in the Cavern Club wondering what it would have looked like during the early 1960s, whilst simultaneously breathing life into Everton’s season.

In four word news:

Robbie Keane, West Ham.

Stephen Ireland to Celtic.

And in six word news:

Sven and McClaren both want Becks.

That is all.

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