The Spoiler enjoys a wonderful night at the darts…
Phwoar! (entire arena punch fists into underside of elbows in unison)
The Spoiler enjoyed a wonderful evening at the darts yesterday, and came away with one overwhelming message for all Spoiler readers everywhere: you must go! It’s totally mental.
Highlights include: Steve The Muffin Man Hine throwing Ginsters buns into the frenzied crowd flanked by a couple of Sexy Santas (pictured) like a scene from the weirdest dream you have ever had. The word on the street is that someone actually leapt through the mob like a salmon and devoured a muffin with the wrapper still on – berserk!
A table of maniacs took it in turns to sprint as far down the middle of their room-stretching table as possible before security guards dressed like shaved gorillas in suits tackled them and dragged them from the arena with the crowd cheering them on.
The prize for best banner of the night goes to the man brandishing the one with “Generic Banter” scrawled on it in marker pen.
And the sight of Raymond van Barneveld leaning back and drinking in the glory will long live in the Spoiler’s mind as one of the greatest celebrations ever seen. In any sport. Brilliant stuff.