Literally a list of Footballers with posh-sounding names
We honestly couldn’t tell you…
After reading about Liverpool’s pursuit of Southampton’s Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain in the wants-to-be-posh-but-is-distinctly-middle-class Daily Mail, The Spoiler got to thinking – are there any other footballers with proper posh-sounding names? Can anyone beat a player with a double-barrelled surname, half of which is the same as a former Prime Minister?
There are a few after the jump. But, as always, help us out with any we’ve missed…
Despite sounding like a scampish young aristocrat with a heart of gold in a Charles Dickens story book, Fortune is in fact the former Manchester United player who was a promising youngster for about nine years.
Matthew Le Tissier
Not only does his name sound posh, but he was born in St. Peter Port, Guernsey. The Spoiler had a holiday there when it was a whippersnapper and can confirm that it is indeed proper posh. There’s an aquarium and everything.
Graeme Pierre Le Saux
Another one from those fancy Channel Islands. He has a son called Lucas and a daughter called Georgina and was once seen reading the GUARDIAN!!! La-di-da.
Christopher Gerald Bart-Williams
Four names! You may know him better as former Sheffield Wednesday and Nottingham Forest midfielder Chris Bart-Williams – veteran of roughly 15 relegation battles.
Jan Johannes Vennegoor of Hesselink
Despite having NEVER been photographed in a suit or tux, he makes it into our list.
According to our in-depth research, the Rapid Vienna striker got his name because, in the 17th century, two farming households, both alike in dignity, in fair Holland, where we lay our scene, married into each other and kept both names. ‘Of’ in Dutch literally means ‘or’ in English, so Vennegoor of Hesselink is either really posh, or somewhere down the line, there was debate over someone’s baby daddy.
We’ve definitely missed loads. Shout us down below…