The big question

Who should replace those sexists Keys and Gray?

The next Saint and Greavsie?


THEY’RE GONE! After the most controversial few days in the history of Britain, Richard Keys and Andy Gray have been turfed out of their Monday night spaceship. Now, the big question… Who should replace them?

There are a few suggestions after the jump…

Gabby Logan and Jacqui Oatley

It would be a case of Sky slamming the stable door after the horses ran away shouting sexist abuse, but this might work. It’s always a bit of a relief to turn on MOTD2 and see the lovely Gabby staring back rather than another member of the BBC Sport golf society, while Oatley is the first female commentator in MOTD history and – according to Gary Lineker – she did really, really, super well.

James Richardson and Clarke Carlisle

You’re reading an intelligent, thoughtful, high-brow football blog – of course you want these two. Richardson has been a much missed presence on the telly and could anchor delightfully for Carlisle who has shown his telly talent with stints on clever clogs shows like Countdown and Question Time.

They could talk all night about the merits of the 4-1-3-1-1 over the 5-2-1-2-3-2, before Richardson signs off with a clever pun while sitting in front of the Italian papers and the biggest ice cream you’ve ever seen.

Jeff Stelling and Paul Merson

Football has become over-intellectualised though, hasn’t it? What with all these fancy foreign coaches and ‘tactics’ and stuff. Football is really a simple a game that can easily be reduced to a series of grunts and noises. These are the men for that particular job.

Jamie and Louise Redknapp

The couple all couples aspire to be. Jamie literally shows how good he is by giving 110% week in, week out all season long – he’s a top pundit. But Louise is also a dab hand in front of the cameras, whether talking about shoes on The Clothes Show or soufflés on Something for the Weekend. If you need further proof of their credentials, just look at that Thomas Cook advert – now THAT is how you position a travel agent as an aspirational brand.

Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand

Brand supports West Ham and used to do a football column for the Guardian, while Ross used to be on a sports show or something – perfect.

And if you think about it – really, really think about it – then Keys and Gray are just a portlier Ross and Brand. Both are sets of Über-men suffering for an off the cuff remark about a woman, despite definitely having the utmost respect for the fairer sex.

Although there’s more chance of Gray shagging someone’s grandmother than their granddaughter.

Who have we missed? Let us know who you think it should be with a comment below…

11 responses so far
  • 99 with a flake // January 25, 2011 at 5:38 pm

    It has to be Richardson. AC Jimbo is absolute class whenever (and wherever) he is on. Besides, since the demise of football Italia, the on-screen time of ice cream sundaes has somewhat melted away….

  • moo // January 25, 2011 at 6:11 pm

    I belong to Jimbo

  • ste // January 25, 2011 at 7:12 pm

    AC Jimbo all day long

  • elcynico // January 25, 2011 at 11:23 pm

    Remember the great Italian football show Richardson used to present on Channel 4? It has to be him.

  • JB // January 26, 2011 at 12:07 am

    Without a doubt it has to be Gordon Strachan to replace Gray. Keys hasn’t gone…….yet.

  • Rob // January 26, 2011 at 1:08 am

    James Richardson,
    Graeme Souness.

    1 commentator, no ex player slow motion analyst who shouts over the replays and tells us what the player was thinking as they were hitting the ball needed.

  • dilly // January 26, 2011 at 2:33 pm


  • Matt // January 26, 2011 at 2:54 pm

    I would def. enjoy a Richardson & Macca pair up; if we’re dreaming and all.

  • Mario Balotelli // January 26, 2011 at 11:52 pm

    Who should replace those dreadful sexists Gray and Keys? That’s an easy one. Someone with big tits.

  • Parke // January 27, 2011 at 1:03 am

    Rae Hudson from goltv. Greatest commentator ever!!! maybe a little biased sometimes but who cares! With quotes like this he makes anything entertaining

    ” Real Madrid’s defence stretched like spandex on Miami beach! And Casillas is left naked.”

  • Parke // January 27, 2011 at 1:05 am

    Oh and for #2 Arshavin like Matt said.

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