Cheerleaders aren’t the reason Crystal Palace are rubbish
If you were looking for pretty young girls with fake tans, blonde hair and velour tracksuits, then you could do a lot worse than get yourself to south London.
Anyone who’s ever wandered the mean streets of actually-alright-Croydon knows there are plenty of these fluorescent creatures roaming the dance floors of TigerTiger on any given Friday night.
However, if you can’t be arsed to listen to Flo Rida all night long, Crystal Palace have done all the work for you (you weirdo) and got a job lot of them to perform at Selhurst Park this season. Not everyone is happy though…
Speaking to everyone’s favourite free paper, The Metro, one supporter said:
“When they come out waving their pom-poms I just hang my head. They put everyone off the game – you see the players eyeing them up when they should be focusing on the game. The sooner they go the better.”
HOWEVER! Since The Crystals have been taking to the field, Palace are unbeaten at Selhurst Park. Their last home defeat came in a 3-0 loss to Swansea City in October – just before The Crystals started doing their thang.
Since The Metro had a pop, the stunnas been vigorously defended by the club and fans alike – even STEVE BOOKSTEIN’S weighed in to support them!
Having seen Palace play at Selhurst Park at the start of this season, The Spoiler will also leap to the defence of The Crystals – Palace were rubbish and we confidently predicted their fall into the third tier.
They now occupy the dizzy heights of 21st and we put the improvement solely down to The Crystals – and getting rid of Edgar Davids, who was w*nk.
Anyway, here’s some cheerleaders falling down…