The one player every team in the Premier League should buy – Part I
Both of these lads should come…
Before anyone comes along and says:
“Surely the one player every team in the Premier League should buy would be Messi.”
…That ain’t an option. What we’ve actually gone and done is listed all the Premier League teams and decided on one player for each of the them that would make them loads better.
There’s a plenty of realism and a bit of wishful thinking but definitely no Messi…
Arsenal – Chris Samba (Blackburn Rovers)
We’d love to see him at Arsenal. He’s the antithesis of everything Wenger seems to look for in a footballer and therefore probably exactly what the Gunners need. Wenger would certainly have his work cut out turning him into a ball player.
Aston Villa – Kyle Walker (Tottenham Hotspur)
Villa’s full-backs rarely venture over the half-way line so the more adventurous Walker would be a welcome addition to a team that now must surely be built around getting the ball to Darren Bent.
Blackburn Rovers – Matthew Upson (West Ham United)
Phil Jones has gone, Chris Samba could go, so Rovers will be in need of a decent centre-half. He’s hardly covered himself in glory this season but he’s still a tidy defender and would do a job at a team like Blackburn’s whose ambitions extend to staying in the league.
Bolton Wanderers – Daniel Sturridge (Chelsea)
Chelsea are apparently about to bag Romelu Lukaku and Didier Drogba looks like he might be staying put. By our reckoning that makes Sturridge – who’s been brilliant on-loan at Bolton – fourth choice striker. He’d surely have to move.
Chelsea – Wesley Sneijder (Inter Milan)
With Frankie Lampard’s powers slowly disappearing, the Blues need an attacking midfielder with guile and loads of goals in ‘em – why not go for (one of) the best? The Spoiler reckons he’d work well with Fernando Torres as well.
Everton – Jermain Defoe (Tottenham Hotspur)
‘Arry seems to have gone off him but there can be no denying that Defoe is bloody brilliant at doing goals and would be perfect for Everton. Wages and fee might be an issue, but surely Bill Kenwright would rather cough up a few quid than have to listen to David Moyes go on about how his side can’t score for another season?
Fulham – Robbie Keane (Tottenham Hotspur)
This just seems to fit doesn’t it? He may have missed some sitters at West Ham but Keane is still a class act and would suit the no-pressure atmosphere at Craven Cottage as he winds down his career.
Liverpool – Juan Manuel Mata (Valencia)
Liverpool need wingers, right? And Mata is a bloody good winger. With Ashley Young off to United and Stewart Downing not the most inspiring signing Liverpool could make (he is good though), Mata fits the bill perfectly.
Manchester City – Alexis Sanchez (Udinese)
Team Spoiler seemed overly excited to get to City and theoretically spend their billions of pounds. In the end we decided on Alexis Sanchez because, well, why not? He’s one of the hottest things on 12 studs and out wide is one of the few areas City don’t already have about 15 options.
More to follow…