GOING NOWHERE

So Newcastle are flogging Cheick Tiote to the highest bidder then…

Will it soon be this man's turn to slag off the owners on Twitter?

tiotepardewwarnssuitors

Want to see Cheick Tiote in your club’s colours come January? Well unlucky folks, because Alan Pardew says that it will take something pretty special (are you listening Comolli?) to prise the Ivorian yellow-card magnet away from the Sports Direct Warehouse.

Don’t believe us? Check this out: “To us, he is very, very important and it would be very, very difficult to get him out of here… they are going to have to pay a lot of money to take anybody out of here.”

And when Pardew says that the Magpies will fight off the offers as bravely as those in the away end of their stadium resist the throes of vertigo, you better beli…who are we kidding?

Pardew on Andy Carroll
“His career path is here…He loves it here and loves the fans – long may it continue…. We have to have a big-club mentality and hold on to our best players.”

Pardew on Kevin Nolan
“Of course Kevin will be captain next season. It had never crossed my mind to change it.”

Pardew on Joey Barton
“I’ve learned the lessons from Andy Carroll, so I won’t be saying he’ll definitely be staying. But I think he will.”

Not that we’re criticising the approach. Newcastle’s performance this season has afforded their buy low, sell high transfer policy a big fat thumbs-up. If anything, they’re showing Liverpool’s new owners how this moneyballing business works.

We’re simply pointing out what 98.764% of the Toon Army will already realise – that just because Pardew says he’ll battle to keep Tiote, it doesn’t mean he hasn’t already discussed 15 possible replacements, 14 of them based in France, with his scouts and the ever-charming Derek Llambias.


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