The Spoiler

The return of the Champions League is less than a week away!

Whiteboard — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 17:23:18 +0000

February 14. An expensive seat at a posh venue, painstakingly but thoughtfully prepared montages and a bit of spine-chilling orchestra music to accompany the dulcet tweet of Howard Webb’s whistle. It can only mean one thing: the return of the Champions League.

That’s right, the scrap for that cup with the Gary Lineker-esque ears resumes [...]

Big call for armchair fans: Milan, Barcelona or Middlesbrough?

Whiteboard — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 16:10:24 +0000

There hasn’t been a bet of the day for a while, so to repay fans of inexpert tipping worldwide, tonight’s feast of football seems like an appropriate time to offer three for the price of one, that price incidentally being nothing.

All prices listed are from bwin, and if you bung all three choices into [...]

Ashley Cole is the only man classy enough to succeed John Terry

Whiteboard — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 16:13:29 +0000

If he hadn’t cheated on the apparent greatest living Briton, used hyperbole to show disgust at Arsenal’s stinginess or shot someone with a rifle, would Ashley Cole really be a 20/1 outsider with William Hill to replace John Terry as England captain?

Take all the role model nonsense out of the equation – and why [...]

Timekeeping not the strong point of Santos president

Nosferatu — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 15:15:45 +0000

In life there is the saying that timing is everything.

Some men meet their future wives by catching a glimpse of them in another car while waiting at a red light or buy a lucky scratchcard when in a supermarket queue or get asked if they can graffiti the Facebook offices for a payment in [...]

Why Brighton fans are thrilled to be planning a trip to Liverpool

Whiteboard — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 11:09:13 +0000

Gus Poyet’s Brighton masterplan involves visiting Anfield on a yearly basis. So the ardour greeting their prize of an FA Cup fifth round date at Liverpool isn’t inspired by awe at the glamour of the treat that Gaizka Mendieta helped serve up but belief that it is a sign that they are Wembley-bound.

The Seagulls [...]

Gary Neville is going to explain the joys of playing for England to the rugby mob

Stretcher Case — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 17:11:03 +0000

Here’s a fact for you – the female figure sitting on the bench at the end of this Match.com advert is actually a ghost.

Seconds before, a 28 year-old woman with dyed blonde hair and really, really, really great skin threw herself in front of a train because of the shame and embarrassment of [...]

Walk away Jose, Real Madrid will soon realise their loss

Nosferatu — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 16:34:31 +0000

Football fans never cease to amaze me.

I mean what more could Real Madrid supporters want? Five points clear at the top of La Liga and more goals that any club ever in the first half of a La Liga season.

There must be 99 per cent of football fans who would give their right [...]

Goals on the menu as Cardiff look to carve Crystal Palace open

Whiteboard — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 12:01:13 +0000

Domestic cup football is often viewed as the Steve Cotterill to the Champions League’s Brian Clough, but Whiteboard is genuinely as excited as Harry Redknapp on transfer deadline day about what this midweek has to offer.

There are Carling Cup semi-finals in England, the prospect of a Pepe-free Clasico in Spain and a quite majestic [...]