One: He’s done his leg and will be out until mid-December. Two: Hleb means bread.

Got a story for The Spoiler? Do YOU like bread? Leave comments below

Mr Mental from Spain has nothing more to say

Family Fortunes is mainly famous for the guy whose mind froze on camera, leaving him with just the word ‘turkey’ sloshing about his brain. Great days.

Days brought back to life by mental Mr Benitez in a press conference yesterday, who, clearly struggling, thought it a good idea to

Edmilson plays easy game of Guess Mr Unpopular

Perhaps envious of the miles of column inches generated by other players at Barcelona, or perhaps just in the mood for a little impish mischief, Barcelona’s Brazilian midfielder Edmilson has claimed, in an “explosive comment” to the Catalan TV3 channel, that

The best programming on the telebox tonight

If you’ve visited any American websites today, you may have noticed a distinct lack of activity. That’s mostly due to the fact that it’s Thanksgiving, and webmasters across the nation are visiting family, overeating and settling down to watch the football. The two games are Green Bay at

It sucks to be Ian Wright

When chirpy Canadian popster Daniel Powter wrote the irritating tune ‘Bad Day’, he must have had a dismal twenty-four hours. But probably not as bad as Ian Wright had yesterday. Not only was his Range Rover taken away by

Eliminate Mark Lawrenson!

The Spoiler had the pleasure of watching last night’s England game through headphones (on a treadmill – don’t ask), and an amazing discovery was made. John Motson’s balanced and relevant commentary comes through the left speaker channel, while Mark Lawrenson’s nonsense come through the right speaker channel. This means a Lawrenson-less game is just a few TV adjustments away! No more ‘It looks like he’s blown the whistle for a foul there,’ and no more ‘I’ve got nothing to say,’ when Motty regretfully asks his co-commentator for some input. Get

Ex-England skipper demands perfection, and his own dunny

Bad news about the football, yes, but The Spoiler has some great news about David Beckham - he’s really starting to get the whole LA vibe.

Only recently he was doing a stateside photoshoot at a fashionable Hollywood studio, and rather than just rolling up, doing a quick wee and getting to business (like, say, Rooney would), he had a couple of demands to