Get yourself a nice preachy t-shirt

People will do anything to emulate their footballing idols - just last week I started a fight in a McDonalds after cheating on my girlfriend in a fivesome that was filmed on the internet.

Now, this website is giving you the chance to be just like your favourite Evangelical Christian, with a replica of Kaka’s famous ‘I belong to Jesus’ shirt.

The shirt, modelled by a very bored person in the picture above, is 100 per cent fine jersey cotton and yours for a steal at $22. Wear one of these, start reading the bible and stop having fun, and maybe you could one day be FIFA World Player of the Year.