A nation mourns as Crouch’s girl hangs up her lingerie for good

Some WAGs DANIELLE LLOYD may be accused of using a relationship with a footballer DANIELLE LLOYD to enhance their career, but the opposite is true of loved-up Liverpudlian Abbey Clancy - she announced today that she is to quit lingerie modelling to be with lanky partner Peter Crouch. Abbey was preparing to take her career to the next stage in LA, but then realised it would be much more convenient to stay here and not do anything at all:

“I had a really big decision to make - whether to stay in Liverpool or enhance my modelling career in LA. Obviously I really love modelling and I’d love to make it big. But it’s not a decision which can be made overnight and my life is fulfilled with my relationship - my modelling career is a bonus. I’m happy with Peter and that’s enough for me.”

The twenty-two year old comes from a football family (her brother Kyle plays for Blakcpool and other brother Sean plays for non league Burscough) and came to Crouchey’s attention when she appeared on Britain’s Next Top Model in 2006. She came second because her look was ‘too glamour’ and not ‘high fashion’ (i.e. her boobs were too big) and went on to perform dismally on Hell’s Kitchen. Despite these reality setbacks, her career took off and she has been wearing see-through dresses, talking loudly in theatres and bathing with other ladies ever since.

Although her American dream is over, Abbey could be about to assault the pop charts - she has already tasted the life of a lip-synching dancer with failed girlband Genie Queen, and in November last year hinted that she would love a solo pop career in the vein of Madonna. Except that she would like people to like her.

Spoiler bonus: As a stark reminder of what we’ll all be missing in the future, here’s Abbey doing an arty lingerie photoshoot with Bryan Adams: