Chelsea star finds unique way to reinvest wages in his club

As the protagonist of Brewster’s Millions discovered, spending a large amount of money is tougher than it seems. Fortunately, Didier Drogba has discovered a novel way of bleeding his £70k weekly wage out of his bank account - he has become the Chelsea club shop’s best customer and frequently buys scores of his own shirts. The Daily Mail sez:

“One Chelsea insider claimed Drogba visits the club shop up to 10 times a week and on one occasion walked out of the store with 40 shirts each costing about £45 a pop - or £1,800 at one fell swoop.”

The Ivory Coast man hasn’t gone insane with vanity - it’s the giant chip on his shoulder that is forcing him to snap up the replicas. Apparently, his shirt is being outsold by those adorned with the Lampard and Terry squad numbers, and he is merely trying to prove his status as the most popular player.

Although he may never reach the same place in the hearts of Chelsea fans that the home grown talent does, he is certainly making an impact back in the Ivory Coast - he sends the shirts back there to friends and relatives, who must be getting through them like Jermain Defoe gets through sexual partners. Zing!