Sunday April 20, 4am, Setanta Sports 1, bet here

Now that the Western hemisphere’s addiction to the reality show has reached near chronic levels, and a generation of kids who think it perfectly natural to emotionally destroy friends and colleagues is ready to contaminate the workplace, it’s good to see some good old fashioned fist-on-face back on the entertainment menu. Joe Calzaghe and Bernard Hopkins will be taking on the roles of “hammer” and “tongs” in Vegas this weekend, although even boxing is not without its hammy emotional soundtrack. Calzaghe was poor, very poor, and was fighting before he was ten. And Hopkins is bad, prison bad. You feel me? Why do boxing’s mightiest oaks only ever grow from hardship? When are we going to see a world title fight featuring, in the red corner, a young man with three decent A levels who has just spent his gap year teaching orang utans to sing, and in the blue corner, a former young musician of the year who hopes to open a funfair for orphans? Baron Lloyd Webber - this sounds like a job for you.

The Spoiler is not in the habit of tipping, but get on Calzaghe. They are both old, but Hopkins is ancient, and only has one good muscle left - his mouth muscle.

Super special Spoiler reader offer: This fight is only available on Setanta. Subscribe for just £5 a month for the first three months if you sign up before Friday night - simply click here and quote code 1904.

The statistics:

* Joe Calzaghe has battled Americans on fifteen occasions, winning ten by TKO, two by KO and three by Unanimous Decision.

*His three unanimous decision victories have come in his last six bouts - the first nine were all knockouts.

* However, Las Vegas has also seen some high-profile British defeats - Ricky Hatton (Floyd Mayweather, 2007), Naseem Hamed (Marco Antonio Barrera, 2001), Frank Bruno (Mike Tyson, 1986) and Barry McGuigan (Steve Cruz, 1986).

To see more betting information on the big fight, head to chickendinner