Cynics suggest that Drogba is capable of cheating on purpose 

Now, obviously The Spoiler has no fixed opinion on anything - being more of an open ear rather than a judgmental yammering gob - but the whisper in the undergrowth is that Drogba might have got himself sent of on purpose to avoid taking the dreaded fifth penalty. An interesting theory, and not completely out of the question.

After all, put yourself in his shoes - he’s Didier Drogba, most opposition fans can’t stand him, but he doesn’t care. Every single stadium he visits, the boos greet him, and the hisses mark his farewell. He will be totally used to people on and off the pitch trying to wind him up, but being a hardened professional he knows not to rise to it - he lets his goals do the talking, to use a horrendous football cliche.

And yet, last night, a morsel of time wasting from Tevez, and the whole of Chelsea went completely loco, tension running high, and the striker chose that moment to lose his professionalism right in front of the ref. He’s been playing the game for long enough to know what happens next.

Was it really the heat of the moment? Or did he not fancy the pressure? The Spoiler is undecided.