Talented footballer knows no shame

Pictured, friends, is an enormous breach of international hotel etiquette - you don’t wander around swishy hotels (namely The Crowne Plaza in Moscow) willy-nilly in just your pants. And yet, that’s exactly what cocky winger Cristiano Ronaldo is doing here, as if he is somehow above the law.

The Man United hero was spotted by a keen snapper helping himself to large quantities of ice from the machine in the lobby. Half naked? Fetching some ice in the middle of the night? Who would do such a thing? This clip featuring Mickey Rourke and Kim Basinger might go some way to explaining the whole sordid situation. WARNING: Contains panpipes and a nipple…