…and neither will Chelsea (Boom! Boom!)

Real Madrid were among a number of clubs who desperately tried to throw exorbitant amounts of money at Bayern Munich for the services of Franck Ribery this summer, and the Frenchman himself admitted to fancying the prospect of sunning himself in Spain.

Despite their relentless pursuit of the Bundesliga’s best player, Los Blancos will not attempt to sign him in the winter transfer window. In lieu of a decent reason for this decision, sporting director Jorge Valdano told Marca:

“I do not think that the winter transfer market is made for players of the size of Ribery.”

At first, we suspected Valdano of backing our ‘Ribery has been replaced by a dwarf‘ conspiracy, but then it became clear that the Spanish giants intend to stick to their original plan of swiping him next summer:

“Ribery is now a matter of the past. But perhaps he is indeed an issue again in the future. “