Also appearing on a computer near you…

Notts County’s puddles prove to be more effective at stopping goals than Sol Campbell

Horse placenta is the new Deep Heat
[Daily Mail]

Five Gunners stars who should tie their belongings in a red and white polka-dot handkerchief, put it on the end of a stick, and hit the road
[Caught Offside]

West Ham’s female fanbase gets better and better
[The Sun]

Although incredibly irritating, vuvuzelas are clearly a big part of African football culture right now. This is South Africa’s World Cup. Just STFU and get on with it, Japan/Alonso. We’re not in the NFL.
[Guardian]

Hooligans force player to switch clubs
[Dirty Tackle]

Lampsie has two attractive women fighting for his attention
[Daily Star]