”What’s happening to me?”

As a grown up, you become so in tune with certain emotions that you almost forget how they feel. That’s what is so great about children - they vocalise these sensations, and remind you exactly how they used to affect you.

Or, should we say, “children” and David Beckham?

As reported in today’s Daily Express, the former Man United winger has been talking at length about the prospect of facing his old team later this month in the Champions League, saying this:

“The thought of playing United always gives me that sick feeling.”

Well, in the spirit of shedding a bit of light on your inner workings, Mr Beckham, that sick feeling is called “feeling a bit nervous”.

Not to be confused with that “funny feeling” that you get when you see Victoria getting ready for bed. That’s something else entirely.