What if the ITV FA Cup blunder was deliberate?

ITV’s decision to show us 117 minutes of unwatchable tripe and then cut away from the only interesting moment has been met with fierce criticism by all the daily newspapers (The Sun provides furious fan quotes; the consistently outraged Daily Mail told us it’s the immigrants’ fault and everything would be better if Princess Diana was still here).

One thing all the reports of the blunder had in common, however, is that they specifically mentioned the three companies whose products were shilled while Dan Gosling was scoring the winner - Tic Tacs, Action for Children and Volkswagen. They all received a massive amount of free publicity from the debacle - is it at all possible that Tic Tacs and co struck a deal with the ITV devil to work their way into the national consciousness?

[Our theory is flawed by the fact that they couldn’t have planned for extra time or for a last minute goal, but everyone loves a good conspiracy, right? If you need us, we’ll be on the roof of Spoiler towers with our shotguns and tin foil hats.]

Try Nicoclean, the new face cream enriched with tobacco extracts

Obesity-peddling restaurant is the athlete’s choice, apparently

Monday 18th August, 2008: Humongous gentleman Michael Phelps helps himself to a McDonalds on the Olympic Green in front of a huge press entourage. This comes shortly after we are told that that the swimmer eats the calorie equivalent of 22 Big Macs a day.

Sunday 17th August, 2008: After pissing all over the 100 metres final, Jamaican Usain Bolt reveals his secret weapon: ‘no Breakfast and McDonalds Chicken McNuggets’.

Saturday 16th August, 2008: Team GB swimmer Rebecca Adlington scoops her second gold in six days, and declares that she will ‘celebrate with a McDonalds‘.

Are we meant to believe that so many Olympians, who dedicate every waking hour to ensuring they are in peak physical condition, would intrinsically want to eat fast food during and after the most important sporting event of their lives? Or has a certain official Olympic partner made sure that gold medal winners have been name dropping their brand?

This kind of sneaky marketing is happening on our shores too. Did

But don’t you just love those fine automobiles that Ford make?