In their latest bid to increase their following in Americaland, Chelsea have produced an official basketball shoe.
The adidas TS Commander LT - which comes with a free scarf and Chelsea shirt - drops on August 29, but will only be available at a retailer named Bodega. They’re based in Boston, where NBA star and Chelsea fan Kevin Garnett plies his trade.
Quite why the Blues chose to launch a basketball shoe instead of taking the natural progression towards a football boot is beyond us, but you can take a closer look at it after the jump…
The Big Country is decimating the world’s favourite sport*
Don’t get us wrong - we love America: their cheeseburgers are delicious, their films highly entertaining, and their willingness to take Jordan and Peter Andre off our hands commendable.
However, we felt outrage upon reading an essay published by Stephen H. Webb, entitled ‘How Soccer is Ruining America‘. Jam-packed with insightful observations (”soccer is clearly an important means by which American energy, drive and competitiveness are being undermined to the point of no return”), the piece caused enough of a stir to be picked up and republished by the Wall Street Journal.
It got us thinking - forget football ruining America - there are at least twenty equally ignorant reasons why America is ruining football.
Listen up, y’all…
Stupid Stadium names
Now the Wankdorf is closed for business, we defy you to find a football ground in any league in the world with a title worse than ‘Pizza Hut Park’.
The deification of Darren Huckerby
Update your history books. Hucks is now a ‘Norfolk team’ legend, responsible for the greatest goal in the history of football.
The word “Soccersphere”
Almost as bad as “blogosphere”.
Post-goal celebration music
Arguably the single most irritating feature of American sport that has infiltrated European football. Just cheering the players isn’t enough?
Green Street
The first entry in our list-within-a-list of crap Hollywood films about football. If you haven’t seen it, just watch the trailer. It’ll all become clear.
Not inviting us to USA ‘94
And for hosting the most boring World Cup final ever. And for making us watch Diana Ross attempt to take a penalty.
Ridiculous rule changes
Partly to satisfy US sports fans’ infamous inability to accept two teams might be strong enough in different areas to actually - gasp - cancel each other out, until 2003, MLS games that ended up as a tie were resolved by an ice-hockey style charge-at-the-goalie shootout. A wonderful stroke of genius subsequently replaced by another… golden goal extra time.
Lacklustre attempts at hooliganism
Note: The Spoiler does not condone violence on or off the pitch,
England star one step closer to kissing California goodbye
Those who were hoping to bump into David Beckham at the Chateau Marmont in March may be disappointed, as the LA Galaxy star has reportedly agreed a £75k-a-week contract to remain at loan club AC Milan, according to Gazzetta dello Sport. That comes to around £4m a year, but it is as yet unknown whether he will be paid in giant novelty cheque form.
The Daily Mail also claim that an agreement has been reached for his lucrative image rights, and the Italians have tabled a £4.35m bid for his signature.
Clearly embarrassed by the fact that Robinho earns more than twice the proposed weekly sum, Beckham has insisted it’s not about the money:
“At the moment Milan is more important than money. I want to think about football before everything else.
“I said in a clear manner what I think, I want to stay at Milan because I’ve rediscovered myself as a football player.”
England star admits he’d rather stay away from California
After playing in a 2-2 draw at Ibrox last night, David Beckham finally spoke out about extending his stay in Milan. Much to the dismay of LA Galaxy fans (all sixteen of them), Becks admitted he wished to finish his career with the Rossoneri:
“My intention is to stay in Milan and I hope the clubs can come to some agreement. Hopefully I can finish my career here.”I haven’t personally spoken to the Galaxy but someone from my side has and they have expressed my desire to sign for Milan.
“At the moment I don’t know if Galaxy will let me go. Hopefully they will. I’ve done all I can and now it’s down to the two teams.”
Playing in Serie A will infinitely increase Beckham’s chances of appearing in World Cup 2010, but he made a commitment to raising the profile of “sawker” in the USA, and risks alienating millions of MLS fans and several sponsors. That’s exactly the kind of damage Brand BeckhamTM usually tries to avoid.
So, should Beckham finish the job he started across the pond, or should he get his career back on track a little closer to home? Votes and comments below, please…
Some American soccerballers paid less then what Cristiano Ronaldo spends on hair gel in a year
A document discoevred on the MLS Players’ Union website declares the salaries of every person playing football in the big country in 2008, and some of the figures make for surprising reading. David Beckham’s $6,500,000.04 (don’t forget the 4 cents) has been well publicised, but as you can see from the listing above above, some of his LA Galaxy colleagues earn a modest $12,900, or just under £8,500 in real money. In other words, Mr B is approximately 504 times more valuable than some of his no-name colleagues.
Wang Jiao eventually claimed a gold medal in women’s 72kg division, and she was sure to give American opponent Ali Bernard a surprisebefore seeing her off in the quarter-finals. Originally spotted at WithLeather.
Tragic injustice struck the world’s greatest WAG Giorgia Palmas yesterday, as she narrowly scraped a victory on The Spoiler, and suffered a crushing defeat over at On205th. It’s criminal, and I have no idea how Terrie B (who?) will sleep at night after learning of her success. (Actually, it will probably be next to a handsome sportsman on top of a large pile of money.)
Today, Andy Roddick’s swimsuit model wife-to-be takes on Gianluigi Buffon’s former Miss Czech Republic…
Round Six: Brooklyn Decker/ Alena Seredova
[click the image to get a better view]
More pictures of Brooklyn here, more of Alena here
Fans incapacitated with silly string, according to picture below
In preparation for Thursday’s match against the MLS all-stars, West Ham somehow found themselves in Columbus, Ohio for a friendly against The Crew. Things were going well yesterday, until shortly after half time, when Hammers fans decided to unfurl a banner reading “ICF [Inner City Firm], 30 Years Undefeated.” Then it all done gone kicked off man:
A halftime brawl between more than 100 fans marred an exhibition match Sunday between West Ham United of the English Premier League club and the MLS’ Columbus Crew.
The fights, which overshadowed West Ham United’s 3-1 win, began when a handful of West Ham supporters, some wearing the team’s claret and blue colors, entered the northeast corner of the stadium where the Crew’s most boisterous supporters typically gather.
Crew supporters began directing chants toward the rival fans, and fights quickly broke out between more than 100 Crew fans and at least 30 West Ham fans. Columbus police officers and Crew Stadium security staff eventually separated the groups.
At first glance, it looks as if East London’s finest have been mixin’ it up with their fists in the Midwest without just cause. However it seems that most Americans’ impression of the club has been gained from Green Street, and they were hellbent on goading them for it. A Big Soccer blogger writes:
”HSH (Harley Street Hooligans) wanted a fight. They had a banner saying “where’s Elijah Wood?” They
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