Germans boast the best gates in the world

No one is contesting the fact that the Premier League is the greatest in the world, but in terms of attendances it lags behind our friends in Germany. The average attendance in the Bundesliga is 42,000, compared to the Premier League’s 35,000. Elsewhere, Spain average just 28,000 a game, while the Italians scrape a lowly 25,000 on average.

The popularity of football in Germany may be attributed to the fact that prices are much more reasonable, and six of their stadia can house more than 50,000 supporters - Borussia Dortmund (72,000), Bayern Munich (69,000), Schalke (61,000), Hamburg (55,000), Stuttgart (51,000) and Hertha Berlin (51,000). A further five stadiums can hold over 40,000 fans.

In England, we have just two stadia that can put more than 50,000 bums on seats - Old Trafford (75,000) and The Emirates (60,000). [Ed. - Err, actually St James Park holds 52,000 too - perhaps the source of the stats (The Sun) assumed the Toon Army had already gone down]

Spain, Italy and England have all hosted the best league in the world at some point, so perhaps the Bundesliga will take over when the Premiership bubble bursts?

Wanderers marketing gurus plan to inebriate the masses

This season, only Blackburn and Wigan have drawn fewer punters than Bolton to Premier League home games, and the Trotters have pulled out all the stops to ensure a full house when the aforementioned Blackburn visit tomorrow.

According to The Daily Mail, the first thousand fans to turn up at the Reebok tomorrow will receive a free beer. In addition, they will be offered cheap food and even more subsidised booze starting at a student union-esque price of £1.75. Take that global economic slowdown!

Attendances at the Reebok fell eleven per cent last season and an average of just 21,933 have watched them in this campaign. The 21,000-odd loyal supporters who miss out on the free lager needn’t fret, as they can take advantage of bargain basement ticket prices:

Ticket prices behind both goals have been slashed to £15 and £5, youngsters can buy a season ticket for £49, and fans are being encouraged to bring banners and flags to the ground’s newly designated ‘singing end’.

The campaign may carry a feint whiff of desperation, but at least they haven’t resorted to Middlesbrough-style begging.