Wanderers marketing gurus plan to inebriate the masses

This season, only Blackburn and Wigan have drawn fewer punters than Bolton to Premier League home games, and the Trotters have pulled out all the stops to ensure a full house when the aforementioned Blackburn visit tomorrow.

According to The Daily Mail, the first thousand fans to turn up at the Reebok tomorrow will receive a free beer. In addition, they will be offered cheap food and even more subsidised booze starting at a student union-esque price of £1.75. Take that global economic slowdown!

Attendances at the Reebok fell eleven per cent last season and an average of just 21,933 have watched them in this campaign. The 21,000-odd loyal supporters who miss out on the free lager needn’t fret, as they can take advantage of bargain basement ticket prices:

Ticket prices behind both goals have been slashed to £15 and £5, youngsters can buy a season ticket for £49, and fans are being encouraged to bring banners and flags to the ground’s newly designated ‘singing end’.

The campaign may carry a feint whiff of desperation, but at least they haven’t resorted to Middlesbrough-style begging.

Newcastle owner caught boozing at the Emirates

Most football fans who enjoy the odd tipple are painfully aware that drinking alcohol in sight of the playing surface has been banned from the beautiful game since 1985. Obviously under the impression that the laws of the land do not apply to millionaires, Newcastle owner Mike Ashley was caught red-handed by Setanta cameras downing a pint of the good stuff in the stands at the Emirates on Saturday evening.

According to red-faced Newcastle officials, Ashley was “offered a drink which he thought was non-alcoholic so he took it in good faith.” However, an Arsenal representative has responded saying non-alcoholic beer is not sold at the Emirates, and they are launching