The Spoiler

Great news for Captain Fabregas


The stats say he will get off to a winning start tonight

William and Cesc embrace

All eyes will be on Cesc Fabregas tonight, who begins his run as permanent Arensal captain when Dynamo Kiev visit the Emirates. According to the boffins at chickendinner, luck is on the side of new Arsenal captains:

Arsenal are entering this game in terrible form with one win in five and having failed to score in three of their last four. However, the Gunners’ last three permanent captains - Patrick Vieira, Thierry Henry and William Gallas - all tasted victory in both their first home match after inheriting the armband and their first European match.

For more statistics on tonight’s Champions League games, visit chickendinner

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Posted: November 25th, 2008 by Ryan Bailey

Fergie’s latest Arsenal taunt, Chelsea’s troubling home form and Carly Zucker dirty talk


Also appearing on a computer near you…

Grid Crasher reveal an ingenious way to steal a car

Football’s worst fan missile incidents
[Bild]

Why Chelsea need to start winning at Stamford Bridge
[chickendinner]

Arsenal’s perfect captain no longer plays for them
[The Offside]

Bradford offer some bargain basement season tickets
[BBC]

Jungle dewller Carly Zucker is definitely missing Joe Cole
[Kickette]

Alex Ferguson takes a dig at Arsenal, saying Villa can finish in the top four
[Caught Offside]

Slightly NSFW Video: Footballer-turned-pornstar Eva Roob gives advice on stripping
[Dirty Tackle]

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Posted: November 25th, 2008 by Ryan Bailey

Cesc Fabregas immediately brings his leadership qualities into question


New captain won’t shout at team or take responsibility

Arsene Wenger and Cesc Fabregas

Most Arsenal fans believe 21-year-old Cesc Fabregas is the best candidate to wear Whingey William’s tear-covered crown (see our poll here), but the Spaniard made some troubling comments in today’s Sun:

“I’m not the type who shouts at everyone and I won’t change that. It’s up to all of us to take responsibility for getting things right again.”

Cesc is hinting that he will take the Steven Gerrard-esque captaincy style of “quietly leading by example”, but surely the current Arsenal team needs a Tony Adams or a Patrick Vieira - someone who will shout and rile players up? Does a team low on confidence need a leader who shuns responsibility before he has even worn the armband?

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Posted: November 25th, 2008 by Ryan Bailey

Vote: Should William Gallas be recalled for tomorrow’s Champions League match?


Former captain could return from the wilderness

William Gallas breakin’ it up

Since being dumped from Arsenal’s losing weekend squad, Whingey William Gallas has reportedly been training “very well” (perhaps he has been running around the cones particularly fast or wearing his bib to an excellent standard), and could be offered a place in the squad for tomorrow night’s match with Dynamo Kiev (against whom he scored a last gasp equaliser in September), provided he apologises to the rest of his team.

So, should Professor Wenger try and reinstate some equilibrium in his side by bringing the Frenchman back? Or will he actually cause more disruption by returning? Votes and comments below, please…

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Posted: November 24th, 2008 by Ryan Bailey

William Gallas reveals big problems in the Arsenal team


Sulky captain complains about complaining team mates

William Gallas

It seems that Arsenal’s disappointing start to the season isn’t only down to Professor Wenger’s mismanagement - captain William Gallas has revealed the team are squabbling like a bunch of school girls:

“When, as captain, some players come up to you and talk to you about a player…complaining about him… and then during the match you speak to this player and the player in question insults us.”

“There comes a time where we can no longer comprehend how this can happen.

“I am trying to defend myself a bit without giving names. Otherwise I’m taking it all [the blame]. It’s very frustrating.

“I’m 31, the player is six years younger than me.”

Gallas refused to name the troublesome player, but Arsenal’s 25-year old stars include Bacary Sagna, Emmanuel Eboue and Robin van Persie. Given his confrontational nature, we’d be willing to bet it was the Dutchman with the French exchange student haircut who caused the kerfuffle.

Captain Gallas also revealed that there was a commotion at half time during the 4-4 north London derby thriller:

“There was a problem at halftime. The only thing that I could say at halftime was ‘Guys, we resolve these problems after the match, not at halftime.

“We have to

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Posted: November 20th, 2008 by Ryan Bailey

Six reasons England will beat The Czech Republic


Setanta Sports 1, 8pm, Free £30 bet here

John terry and fabio Capello

That old Italian man with the trendy specs may have made an unpopular choice in his permanent captain, but that doesn’t matter: England will send the Czechs back to that tiny landlocked republic they call home empty handed tomorrow night. Here’s why…

1. England are unbeaten in their last five meetings with the Czech Republic, winning four and drawing the other.

2. Czech Republic have never managed to beat England at Wembley, losing five and drawing one of their six previous contests on English soil.

3. Capello’s men

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Posted: August 19th, 2008 by Ryan Bailey

Rio Ferdinand makes his rapping debut


Big centre-back is about to set the airwaves alight

Rio Ferdinand and Usher

White Chalk Music Ltd was founded by occasional England captain Rio Ferdinand (pictured above with a gentleman who advocates the poppin’ of collars) and his business partner Courtney Richardson with the intention of finding the ‘newest and freshest’ talent Manchester has to offer. The victor in a competition to be signed by Rio’s label was extremely new and fresh rapper Nia Jai, an ex- nurse from Burnage. Her debut album Black Ice will be released on October 6, and it features one of the greatest lyricists of our time, who also happens to play for Manchester Utd. On one track, Ferdinand raps:

“This is Rio Ferdinand. Make sure you do not sleep on Nia Jai, White Chalk’s first signing. This girl spits out fire.”

Nia Jai, who should under no circumstances should be ‘slept on’, is being tipped for stardom, yet The Telegraph claims Rio’s friends are not too impressed by his musical contribution. Clearly, they don’t know great art when they hear it.

See Nia Jai collaborating with Chipmunk and Natty Boii after the jump…

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Posted: August 7th, 2008 by Ryan Bailey

WAG No. 146: Minki van der Westhuizen


Oddly-named model who once bowled over unpopular SA captain

South African captain Graeme Smith may not be the most-loved man in English cricket (KP once referred to him as an ‘absolute muppet’), but this has absolutely no effect on his ability to bring home the proverbial bacon in the WAG department. During the South Africa tour of India in 2004, the media couldn’t get enough of his relationship with Minki van der Westhuizen, who was the reigning Sexiest Woman in the World according to a popular gentleman’s periodical.

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Posted: August 1st, 2008 by Ryan Bailey