San Marino side wanted Schumi to lend then his skills

Grid Crasher editor Ollie Irish steps in to tell us about Herr Schumacher’s latest post-F1 adventures…

Michael Schumacher had the chance to play in the first qualifying round of this season’s Champions League, but turned down the opportunity, no doubt so he could spend more time falling off a motorbike.

Schumacher has played for FC Echichens in the Swiss league, and was asked whether he would be available to play for San Marino champions SS Murata against FC Gothenburg in next week’s Champions League first qualifying round. Murata also want Brazilian legend Romario to play for them, but it seems unlikely that either man will pull

UCL quarter-final second leg, Sky Sports 2, 7.45pm, bet here

“I spent twenty years at Real Madrid and second is no good,” announced Rafa Benitez yesterday, before dismantling Arsenal with a series of unfathomable hand gestures. Considering Senor Benitez never made it to the Madrid first team, second was in fact pretty good for him, especially as the reserves didn’t exactly cover themselves in glory yet he still squeezed two decades of employment out of the club. But Rafa’s actions speak much louder than his words, and he can spout all the gibberish he likes if he keeps on winning games like last night. Meanwhile, in the heart of polite Cheshire society, Sir Alex is laughing fit to burst, probably with a throaty “heh heh heh.” The arch-foe Wenger has been humiliated, and his two other English rivals for the Champions League now have to try and kill each other, while Sir Alex gets to slide through against a below-strength Roma and a confused Barcelona in the semis - what could be simpler? “I spent twenty years at Manchester United,” he might say, “and coming second is sometimes harder than coming first.”

The statistics

* Wayne Rooney has scored four in five against Roma, Ronaldo has three from four.

* Since the Champions League took its current guise, Roma have never