Hey, we love Hollywood… but that’s about it

Let’s not mince our words - some things about America are brilliant. They’ve given us cheeseburgers (pictured), The Wire, James Brown, sex scandals, trainers, plastic surgery, meat on a stick, wise cracking children, cheerleaders and war. But, that’s no excuse to ever let them host a football World Cup again. Here’s a list of reasons why that would be a rubbish idea:

1. They HATE football

Rather arrogantly, they play the baseball “World Series” every year, ignoring the fact that the rest of the world prefers a slower version called rounders (great for a flirtatious summer picnic, by the way). But basketball is their number one - essentially giants playing catch. Also high on their radar is American Football, golf, athletics, and gentlemen wrestling in leotards. Real football barely even computes.