There are too many distractions…

Parma FC recently held one of their training sessions in the Cittadella park, an area of Parma that is invariably occupied with scantily clad beautiful Italian ladies on a sunny day. Suddenly, straying outside the confines of the training ground doesn’t seem like such a bad idea.

Spoiler bonus: The distracted players in the picture above are defenders Christian Panucci and Mohamed Traoré - the former has an excellent reason not to look at bikini-clad strangers.

The very latest scurrilous deadline day rumours…

Berbatov’s decision to join Manchester Utd and Robinho’s last-gasp decision to sell out made the last deadline day bloody exciting right up until midnight. Today’s action is scheduled to stop at 5pm, so Harry Redknapp and Mark Hughes can get in their jammies at a sensible hour tonight.

Here’s what happened so far…

Eidur Gudjohnsen stayed at a Hull City centre hotel last night, and will be having talks at the KC Stadium later today.

The Daily Mail claim Liverpool have accepted a £15m bid for Robbie Keane from Tottenham. Just six months after departing, the tiny Irishman could re-sign later today.

Andrei Arshavin is currently residing in a London hotel, so Arsenal’s painful negotiations with the Russian Euro 2008 sensation may finally reach their conclusion today.

To fill Robbie Keane’s spot on the bench, Liverpool are attempting to bring Real Madrid’s Javier Saviola to Anfield on loan.

We weren’t aware that Manchester City were after Roma defender Christian Panucci, but Sky Sports say his agent claims the Italian has turned down deals from them and Hull.

Should the blue side of Manchester acquire the services of Roque Santa Cruz later today, Blackburn are eyeing up Schalke’s german forward Kevin Kurányi.

Christian Panucci’s lady is the backbone of Italian television

Having only seen Italian TV in fragments on the internet, it would appear that their entire programming schedule is based around filming spectacular beauties with huge cleavage wobbling around atop fake surfboards, or similar activities that make their chests move.

For this reason, one of the stars of the Italian telebox is Rosaria Cannavò, ex-girlfriend of workshy Antonio Cassano and current sentimental partner, for the second time, of Christian Panucci. And to think, all we get in the UK is Kerry Katona: Crazy in Love…