.. but we sure as hell will

“If I’m honest, we became a bit of a circus in terms of the whole WAG situation,” said Rio Ferdinand at yesterday’s press conference, with a totally straight face.

What is he talking about? These clowns are the best around, with their endless shopping bags, enormous haircuts, and big moisturised faces! Enjoy some cheerful pictures of them after the jump…

Premier League, 8pm, Setanta Sports 1, bet here

Radio Five Live was this morning encouraging listeners to text in their favourite sporting axioms, such as motor racing’s “When the flag drops, the nonsense stops”, cricket’s “Catches win matches” or sprinters’ “Go on the “b” of the bang.” To this small pile of wisdom, the Wager would like to add something learnt from Newcastle’s dire predicament: “Never hire a manager whose CV includes the word ‘circus’.”

Newcastle’s travelling fiasco tonight checks in at Birmingham, where defeat would leave them just one game away from their worst nightmare: