Veteran star grasses up former teammate for DVLA offences

During his days at West Ham, Shaun Newton received a seven month ban for lapping up a little too much tasty cocaine. The midfielder, who is currently unemployed, now finds himself in more trouble, as he stands accused of nine charges of attempting to pervert the course of justice:

[Teddy Sheringham], 42, said ex-West Ham colleague Shaun Newton offered to “get rid” of the ticket after he was clocked at 64mph in a 40mph zone in 2005.

Sheringham told Croydon Crown Court: “I was moaning about getting the ticket, and Shaun Newton said, ‘Give me £50 and I’ll sort it out’.”

Ex-West Ham player, Bobby Zamora, 27, said he paid Newton to “have a look” at a ticket.

Allegedly, Newton helped teammates escape fines by claiming fictitious drivers were actually behind the wheel.

We can’t say too much, as legal proceedings are still active on this case, but if any illegal activity is proven, let’s hope the judge throws the book at them. All too often, cocky footballers believe they are above the rules that govern the rest of society, and this would bring them right back down to earth.

[The Sun]

Midfielder devises cunning plan to waste more of Newcastle’s money

Joey Barton’s post-Christmas ‘leave of absence’ has cost his club over £200k in wages, and now he has found another way of depriving his club of liquidity.

Barton was given bail on the condition that he remain under the supervision of the Sporting Chance clinic in Hampshire, and to curb his behavioural problems, he must observe a curfew between

Joey Barton’s special Christmas breakfast is breaking the Newcastle bank

According to his therapist at the Sporting Chance clinic in Hampshire, Joey Barton will not be playing in ‘the near future’.

The therapist, the brilliantly-named Peter Kay, says Joey will remain with him ’24 hours a day’ until his next court appearance on January 16. While Mr Kay will undergo irreparable emotional and physical damage during