Victoria’s Secret model with a taste for terrifying boxer-types

In the world of modeling, 24-year-old Czech Karolína Kurková is a big deal: only Gisele Bündchen and Heidi Klum are in greater demand, and she has made a comfortable living posing in clothes that only Frank Lampard can afford for the past nine years. Essentially, she could have any man she wanted, but according to German tabloid Bild, the blonde lovely has directed her affections towards a man whose nickname is Dr Steel Hammer, and whose appearance resembles that of a provincial nightclub bouncer. Ukrainian heavyweight boxing champion Wladimir Klitschko is a lucky chap.

Old Italian gent has failed to live up to his fanfare thus far

Last December, we all thought that England had hired a winner. The mood across the nation stood in stark contrast to the underwhelmed vibe that followed the appointment of a man who guided Middlesbrough to 14th in his final Premier League season. In Fabio Capello, England were getting a manager who had won titles in his last three seasons - two of which have since been revoked - and who had been a champion at every club he had managed. Not only that but he was a disciplinarian too. Someone who would do what was best for the team rather than catering for his stars.

Everything was going to plan at first. Capello was taking the job so seriously that he left David Beckham out of the squad for a friendly against Switzerland, a nothing game where Goldenballs was supposed to win his 100th cap, because he wasn’t fit enough. He dropped Michael Owen from the starting line-up and played previous outcast Matthew Upson in defence.

But gradually warning signs became apparent. Despite having already given David James

Come and get it before the YouTube gods take it away

If you’re in the mood for schoolboy defending, ropey team selection booing crowds, you could do a lot worse than watching the video above.

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That old Italian man with the trendy specs may have made an unpopular choice in his permanent captain, but that doesn’t matter: England will send the Czechs back to that tiny landlocked republic they call home empty handed tomorrow night. Here’s why…

1. England are unbeaten in their last five meetings with the Czech Republic, winning four and drawing the other.

2. Czech Republic have never managed to beat England at Wembley, losing five and drawing one of their six previous contests on English soil.

3. Capello’s men

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England friendlies are nearly always dreadful, but that doesn’t stop the preemptive wave of excitement - even when they are inconveniently scheduled during the opening week of the season.

Capello’s squad selection for his final friendly before World Cup Qualifying was hardly inspiring: the Italian leant towards the same players again, with Ashley Young inexplicably absent and hints about Darren Bent’s inclusion coming to nothing. But of the players named in the squad, who deserves to start?

Here’s what we think:

Joe Hart
We know what David James can do so there’s no need for him to play and of Joe Hart and Paul Robinson, the former is more worthy of being given the chance. The Manchester City player made a quiet debut in the second half against Trinidad and Tobago in June, but a better judgement could be made if he plays a full match against stronger opposition.

Matthew Upson
The Spoiler would prefer to see Upson or Woodgate start in central defence alongside the new England captain to test some new partnerships but Capello is almost certain to go with Ferdinand and Terry together. So as we’ve all seen plenty of Cashley, why not try Upson on the left over Chelsea reserve Wayne Bridge to give England another option?

Rio Ferdinand
Hopefully the Man United defender will be leading

Czech star attempts the ‘naked on cardboard boxes’ look

Earlier this month, Atletico Madrid signed experienced defender Tomáš Ujfaluši from Fiorentina. The La Liga side, however, may regret their decision when they see these photos taken of the Czech Republic star and his wife Kateřina Ujfaluši. Frightening stuff.

More unsettling images from the fierce Ujfaluši photoshoot below…

Defeat at Wembley will make Scotland the best home nation

The latest FIFA Rankings were published today, and England sit in lowly fifteenth place (down from ninth last month), while Scotland have climbed a spot to reach sixteenth.

The drop has occured because the rankings are calculated by the last four year’s of results, and England’s relatively solid Euro 2004 performance has just fallen out of range. The biggest concern for England fans, however, is that Scotland could overtake them if they fail to beat the Czech Republic at Wembley on August 20th. On the same day, the Scots are hosting Northern Ireland, and only a victory against the Czechs will ensure the chaps from above Hadrian’s Wall don’t jump ahead in the rankings for the first time since 1995.

On the one hand, this is a potentially huge embarrassment for the English. On the other, the FIFA rankings are an irrelevant waste of time and nobody cares.

Is there a higher force at work?

Hoddle was right, some people are cursed. Perhaps not in the same repulsively narrow minded and disturbing fashion he attempted to smudge on the nation’s brains, but somewhere in the same spooky ballpark. After all, look at Petr Cech - he obviously spent a former life making scathing remarks to a princess, or waging war on harmless little butterflies. Because, as things stand, his life just got rubbish.

Czechs crash out due to keeper’s temporary rubbishness

Thoroughly dependable shot stopper Petr Cech momentarily experienced a condition known as ‘Paul Robinson-itis’ last night, as he gifted Turkey a victory and a place in the quarter-finals.

The Chelsea keeper was man enough to take full blame for the defeat, and Chelsea Pies are even suggesting the blunder was a good thing, as scouts from the likes of Inter Milan will have been scared off.

Cech’s mistake wasn’t the only example of ‘interesting’ goalkeeping this weekend - did anyone notice Edwin van der Saar’s volleyball-style wrist punch thing he did on Friday night?

Portugal move on, Switzerland first to be evicted

“What makes a man turn neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?” The words of Futurama ship captain Zapp Brannigan will be no doubt be echoing in the minds of Switzerland’s inoffensive natives, who were booted out of their own tournament by a late Turan strike last night.

Elsewhere, Chelsea boss Luiz Felipe Scolari led his adopted home nation to the knockout stages with a solid victory ove Petr Cech’s Czechs.