At 34, is it not time to be packing this shit in?

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The Spoiler has no idea what is going on here, but Francesco Totti’s mullet is nice

How have Capello’s England done against the world’s best so far?
[Guardian]

Fans of being laughed at should get John O’Shea’s new signature boots
[Off the Post]

Eduardo is tired of collecting splinters on the bench
[Caught Offside]

Remember Freddy Adu? Of course you do. Next, we want to know where Cherno Samba, Tonton Zola Moukoko, Andri Sigporsson and all the other Championship Manager faux-legends ended up
[BBC Sport]

Kaka wants Beckham at WC2010. So he can run rings around him in a quarter-final
[The Sun]

Ben Foster refuses to accept his own rank mediocrity
[Telegraph]

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After this, and the one where he controls the ball dropped off a block of flats, I might just bother to watch ‘Wayne Rooney’s Street Striker’. Maybe. Probably not.

Football’s 10 best celeb fans. How did Justin Timberlake get to be friends with Alan Smith?
[Caught Offside]

Thailand’s national football team double their chances of dropping dead on the pitch
[FourFourTwo]

Posh gets David’s Christmas present early
[The Mirror]

For some reason there is consensus in the Newcastle boardroom that an email address is an adequate title for a stadium
[Journal Live]

Polish keeper sacked for making homophobic remarks in his autobiography - with a title like “Fucking Polack”, I guess controversy was to be expected
[Deadspin]

Swine flu masks to be handed out at Dynamo Kyiv vs Inter
[Football Italia]

Since there’s nothing else going on today…

With the MLS season drawing to a close, the league have released their candidates for 2009’s goal of the season. Although it might look like they’ve sort of missed the point and just documented every shot that went in, trust us, there are some pearlers in there (Brian McBride@ 1:35, for instance.)

Italian is the richest manager in British football

In his most recent book, Richard Branson reveals that rich lists are seldom accurate, based as they are on estimations and public domain information. Nevertheless, the good folks at Four Four Two have this week released the British Football Rich List, and there are few surprises at the top. David Beckham tops the players’ list with a supposed £125m fortune, and the wealthiest person in British football is still the QPR owner who isn’t about to be kicked out of the game, Lakshmi Mittal. The Indian steel magnate is said to be sitting on £18.4bn, nearly £1.5bn more than second-placed Sheikh Mansour bin Zayed Al Nahyan.

In the richest manager top ten, noted money fan Harry Redknapp places at number seven with £10m, while second place is held by under-fire Ipswich coach Roy Keane, who apparently amassed the majority of his £27m fortune in his playing days.

The richest gaffer in Britain is also the one who has to take charge of the least amount of games - England manager Fabio Capello is worth £30m due to his utter refusal to pay tax hugely successful career.

[See the richest player list here, the manager list here and the full top 100 list here]

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The Guardian Gallery takes a look at Fergie’s space-time continuum

Fergie’s managerial greatness questioned
[DJ Mick]

Portsmouth are unpaid and lovin’ it
[Dirty Tackle]

Are the aforementioned Portsmouth chasing after Rafa Benitez?
[Caught Offside]

David Beckham’s beard inspires a lazy beard compilation that we wish we had thought of first
[Daily Mail]

Hull hope to benefit from the Bullard bounce
[Betfair Football]

Gianfranco Zola could be tempted to Napoli
[The Telegraph]

Darren Bent reveals concern for the ozone and a love of Katy Perry
[ChannelBee]

Sorcerer is currently making anti-CRon spell in his ‘laboratory’

The ever-mental Spanish sports papers have excelled themselves once more, with news reaching us from El Mundo that Real Madrid is under siege by an anonymous voodoo priest.

A letter has been received by the club from a man who claims to have cast a spell that would leave the Portugese man-o’-sex crocked in a freak accident, after being contracted to do so by a mysterious frenemy (Sir Alex? Ruud? Nereida Gallardo?):

I’m not antimadridista. I have nothing against this great club. I am a professional and someone has paid very well for me using my powers. I have been hired to make Cristiano Ronaldo suffer a serious injury.

A delicious and extremely life-like tribute to a national hero

[Dirty Tackle]