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“I’m one of those girls who’d walk away if he cheated.” We won’t hold you to it Imogen
( Holy Moly )

Get the lowdown on Rafa’s latest attempt to waste some money
( Caught Offside )

Who was a bigger mistake - Shevchenko or Berbatov?
( Footy Factor )

Luis Figo’s wife. Not unattractive
( Big Smudge )

Leicester have the cheek to issue Edgar Davids with an ultimatum, and old favourite Peter Taylor may be set for a return to football
( Team Talk )

This girl really knows her stuff…

As mentioned just yesterday, former-WAG Danielle Lloyd has recently opened a sex school in Nuts magazine, and not a minute too soon. The Spoiler has been bumbling around for years, totally unable to tell whether anything taking place between those sweaty sheets was in any way worthwhile. Some days, it felt like such a chore.

Now, today, Danielle tells us: “It can be a pleasurable experience for both parties and there’s always the chance she’ll repay the favour!”

Yeah, um, you’ve lost us there, Lloyd.

[Nuts]

Ex-WAG still fascinates us…

Every single human being has lived through the traumatic night terror about arriving at work having forgotten to get dressed properly.Your colleagues laugh at you, pointing at your pathetic spotty boxer shorts, your weedy legs, their cackles lodging in your brain, never going away. Taunting you at nighttime. Hence, The Spoiler’s heart goes out to Danielle Lloyd - famous for servicing the sexual wants of Teddy Sheringham - who opened an Ultimo Shop in Debenhams in Dudley with just her bra on (pictured), exhibiting a curious mile-wide cleavage. Clusters of guffawing photographers were on hand to catch her putting a brave orange face on things, weirdly.

Chin up, Lloyd. Chin up.

Atkinson goes toe-to-toe with Lloyd

Between them, Danielle Lloyd and Gemma Atkinson have snogged at least four footballers, perhaps more. We’re talking Ronaldo, Sheringham, Defoe - all the greats. And yet, they no longer appear to fit the modern footballer’s distinguished palate, with Lloyd opting instead to service musicians, and Atkinson hunting around for dates in a set of aggressive leather trousers. Still, no matter, they will be back, especially if their raunchy calendars are anything to go by.

In her version, Atkinson has perfected an interesting arm-draping pose that looks fantastic/weird. While Lloyd has opted to showcase typical everyday shots, such as “legs akimbo on a balcony”, “bed sitting during Roman times”, and “bathroom nakedness”. But which one of these steamy young vixens is hotter? Let us know with a vote, then enjoy their art after the jump…

Sweet Baby Joseph, it is HOT outside. It’s all ice lollies, hand held electronic fans and bikinis in this office. But don’t be fooled, we’re not just keeping ourselves cool, there’s also work to be done. Today’s transfers read like this:

Peter Crouch to Portsmouth
So long are Crouch’s spindly spiders legs that he’s somehow managed to score thirteen goals this season - all from his seat in the dugout. Just imagine how he’d get on if he was actually playing. Word is, Portsmouth have been doing exactly that.

Michael Kightley to West Ham
Despite the fact that Alan Curbishley headed straight into hiding after getting humiliated by Man United, the gossips at the Mirror have been heard going on and on about how he wants the Wolves winger, and by Jimmy he’s going to get him.

Buying a house with Jermain Defoe is a quick route to single life

She only stole him away from another WAG at the beginning of December, but Danielle Lloyd is already looking for a house to share with Jermain Defoe. Sorry, let me rephrase that: Danielle Lloyd is looking for a house to buy with Jermain Defoe’s money.

A ‘pal’ has revealed to Now Magazine that ‘they’re looking around the £2m mark. She fancies a little Shakespearian-style cottage with full-on beams, the whole shebang.’

While this sounds like a perfectly reasonable thing to do after

Grasping model breaks a fat chunk off another dumbcluck’s fortune

Tottenham fans will be delighted to hear that after a season of disappointment there is some good news at last: third-choice striker Jermain Defoe has bought a £20,000 watch for girlfriend Danielle Lloyd. Apart from the childish pleasure the supporters doubtless derive from watching their money make its mazy way through the Spurs digestive system and out onto a model’s wrist, additional delight comes in the form of the happiness the timepiece has brought the couple.

“Dani’s under no illusion that she means the world to Jemain,” said a “pal”, possibly from a mental hospital, to the

Getting married AND releasing a DVD about fitness? Wow

While the rest of us gorged on cooked meat and strong European lager over the festive season, one of the nation’s many racist glamour models was keeping herself very busy indeed.

Danielle Lloyd - her who has gone almost a full year without telling Shilpa Shetty to “fuck off home” - was spotted