Could the World Cup hopeful go from Los Angeles to Lancashire?

When his self-imposed US exile expires, David Beckham is likely to rejoin AC Milan: he recently reasoned that the move would be born out of “patriotism” and passionate for his country”, perhaps not realising that Milan isn’t in England.

However, a transfer back to the Premiership is still a possibility, and the latest club to be thrown into the fray are Blackburn. They are linked to Mr B via 412-year-old Spanish defender and former Real Madrid teammate Michel Salgado:

“David and I are still friends. He asked me all about my new club.

“Could I get David to Blackburn? Of course I’ll have to speak with him.

“The problem might be we have to collect money from the players to pay his wages.”

Spoiler bonus: We don’t think that Beckham will be lured to Ewood Park by the prospect of playing with his old amigo, so Blackburn will have to remain internationally famous only for its mention in this song…