Manchester Utd star jumps on social networking bandwagon

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It must be tough for a world famous footballer to move to a foreign country and attempt to make friends, yet Cristiano Ronaldo has managed to conduct many social interactions outside of soliciting prostitutes during his time in England. This may be due to the fact that he has embraced the information super highway: he regularly used to talk to current squeeze Nereida Gallardo on MSN Messenger, and now it appears that he invites strangers to talk to him through Facebook.

I received the friend request shown above this morning, and it looks pretty genuine. (I mean, we all know Cristiano hails from Detroit, Michigan, right?) The only indication the invite may be the work of a fraudster is that the winger is wearing a Manchester Utd shirt in the profile picture - he wouldn’t be caught dead in one of those anymore.

What’s that? A slow news day, you say?

The real reason for Jermaine Jenas’ recent good form

In the 2007/08 season, Spurs midfielder Jermaine Jenas netted seven goals, produced solid and consistent performances every week and earned his first cap (and goal) in Capello’s England side against Switzerland [that’s his first cap under Capello’s regime, not for England in general - Ed.]. Some blame his transcendence on new manager and mentor Juande Ramos, but others give credit to his girlfriend of six years Sabrina Keogh, a lady who looks jolly smashing in a bikini.

A Miss Italy who dates a footballer? Surely not

Due to a trend started by good ol’ George Best in the sixties, the most popular occupation of your typical WAG of the Day appears to be ‘beauty queen’: Miss Italy 2003 Francesca Chillemi joins Aída Yéspica, Vincenza Cacace, Elisabetta Gregoraci and Giorgia Palmas in the realm of competitive goodlookingness. Francesca’s efforts have been rewarded not only with a crown and scepter, but also the affections of Cagliari Calcio’s Vincenzo Marruocco and more recently Roma’s sass-mouthed midfielder Alberto Aquilani.

Discriminatory Facebooking has put Mrs Marc Bircham under scrutiny

Hate-monger Danielle Lloyd has just about managed to drag herself clear of the racism row of Celebrity Big Brother, but now another WAG appears to have fallen into the bigotry fray. Thirty-four-year-old Jadene Bircham, wife of semi-Canadian Yeovil midfielder Marc, has appeared in the red tops this week for joining a Facebook group called: “”If you don’t like England then f**k off back to where you came from!” Topics in the group, which has now been closed, included ‘Does anyone find Muslim females attractive?’ and ‘Black ethnic groups are more likely to be criminal’. Jadene has defended herself with the following statement:

“I’m not going to lie to you, I read it and thought it would be quite funny but I didn’t even bother having a good look at it. I do agree that if you come to this country and you don’t like it, then fair enough, you shouldn’t be here. I’m going to be leaving the group, I didn’t realise what was on there.”

Use social networking to pretend you know famous people!

Are you bored with your regular friends? Are they not famous enough, or adept in the practise of fivesomes? Well stuff people you can talk to and socialise with - add some Premier League footballers to your clique!

In a move that has literally taken my Facebook habits by storm, I have started Premier League friend whoring. So far, I have found what appear to be genuine profiles from Leroy Lita, Theo Walcott, Wayne Routledge and Anthony Stokes. If you are so inclined, it might be worth

Cuckolding WAG has bizarre botox procedure

On my daily quest to defame Britain’s favourite serial WAG/ racist, I stumbled upon this story. I still can’t quite believe it can be real, but it is being carried by several Lloyd fan blogs and she’s superficial enough to do it. Anyway, if it helps to lower her in the estimation of society, then it’s good enough for me:

Danielle Lloyd has had Botox injected in her armpits in a desperate bid to cure her sweat problem.

The former Miss Great Britain was so

There’s no place for racist models on social networking site

We at The Spoiler spend a more-than-reasonable amount of time on Facebook, and I was recently invited to a new group by a model friend. The group is called ‘Charlotte over Danielle any day’, and it’s position in the WAG war between Charlotte Meares and Danielle Lloyd is clear: ‘Charlotte is better off away from that c*nt and his slag of a girlfriend,’ reads the group description.

A number of prominent models, who Dani may have once counted among her friends, have joined the group in support of Miss Meares, and in thorough condemnation of Jermaine Defoe and his new tolerance-impaired WAG. Even Charlotte herself has posted on the group, and the terms ‘back stabbin [sic] bitch’ and ‘absolute slosh pot’ are used liberally.

Check it out and show your lack of support for Danielle Lloyd by joining here. And if you can’t see the page, you’re not a Facebook member, which technically means you don’t exist.