West London club linked to every player under the sun
According to Marca (a daily pro-Madrid sports paper), or specifically a Mr Garcia Caridad director of Radio Marca, Chelsea have offered 50 million Euros (around £40m) for Fernando Torres.
Avram Grant has already shown interest in the Spanish striker, after asking Benayoun to introduce them. The powers that be at Liverpool, however, are reportedly not interested in listening to offers.
This isn’t the first time the striker has been linked with a departure. Last month, we reported on an article in The Times that claimed Liverpool would be obliged to offload Torres and Babel
It seems that Liverpool don’t limit their homoerotic behaviour to the pitch - they’re even at it during training! Thanks to keen Sporno fan Laura for showing us why Fernando Torres wouldn’t last a week in prison.
Which star striker will help keep their manager in a job?
Liverpool’s last five games have averaged 3.6 goals, while Chelsea’s home games this season have seen an average 2.61 goals a game. With any luck, this means that Liverpool will break their Stamford Bridge goal drought and we will see a high scoring match.
If it is to be a striker’s game, who will come out on top - Didier or Fernando? Votes and comments below, please.
Someone will go, but will they be from the boardroom or the dressing room?
The Liverpool boardroom soap opera continued today as George Gillett told his former buddy Tom Hicks to zip it, following his outburst at Rick Parry last week:
“I am saddened at this latest outburst from Tom. If he wanted a serious discussion on the issues to help the club move forwardhe should bring his views to the board and not to Sky Sports.”
While it seems that Hicks and Parry will not part with their 50 per cent stake in the club until the other is cold in the ground, something will clearly have to give soon. So who will be forced out first? Will it be a member of the board who gives in and packs up his desk, or will a member of the coaching staff or squad be forced out by the squabbling and politics? Votes and comments below, please.
Spanish striker could be working for a bank next year
According to The Times, Liverpool will be forced to sell Fernando Torres and Ryan Babel if they do not stump up £31.5m owed to creditors.
Usually, Premier League clubs fund purchases through television income, but Liverpool made the unusual step of borrowing the money from banking institutions to pay for their star striker and the tricky Dutchman. The club refinanced the £31.5m debt in January, at the same time as they secured a £350m refinancing package. Liverpool will have to pay £30m a year in interest alone on the huge loan, the terms of which end next July. If they fail to repay the smaller loan by the end of the 18-month agreement, the Reds will have no choice but to sell Torres and Babel.
Even technology can’t keep up with Torres’ ungodly scoring rate, as this weekend he plundered his way into the 30s. A clever cyber-genius has, however, located his first twenty-eight Liverpool goals and popped them together in an easy-to-view video clip. Enjoy.
Sporno lover James from East London has spotted a tackle that almost revealed Fernando Torres’,er, tackle. Thanks for the alarming insight into the Liverpool striker’s body shaving habits, James.
If you’ve seen any great Sporno, send it in and we’ll mail you a tenner for your troubles.
The young striker has finally compiled his memoirs
I stole this fascinating snippet from On The Bench, who in turn stole it from a BBC message board. I’m almost 65 per cent sure it’s fictitious.
“Flying into Manchester airport for the signing was one of the most exciting days of my career. The limo transferring me took a while longer to reach the ground than I expected but once there I was greeted by a sea of red. The chanting and atmosphere were brilliant and it all passed by in a blur.
Once inside the ground I was greeted by the manager, the first time we had met face to face. He was a lot heavier than I expected but spoke to me in good Spanish which made me feel most welcome. We went straight into a conference room for the official signing.
After I had put pen to paper the manager turned to me and said “Welcome to the biggest club in the World”.
I said thank you and asked “When will I meet Wayne and Cristiano”?
There followed about ten minutes of confusion from which it transpired that there are two clubs in the North West of England known as the “Reds” and my idiot agent had got them mixed up.
However I had signed so had to get on with it. Benitez was known as the “Gaffer”. I asked Stevie G (the only other player at the club who could control the ball) why this was.
He explained that in English “gaffe” is an embarrassing mistake. Apparently even the owners called Rafa “gaffer”.
