The headline that launched a thousand Rebecca Loos jokes

Now that David Beckham has finished his extended loan spell in Milan, he leaves behind a half decent standard of football, some brilliant TV shows and his favourite Italian delicacy. It’s called “little bum”, and it’s made from pig’s rears. Apparently, Mr B can’t get enough of it:

David - who has been in the European country since January without wife Victoria - was first given the food by his club’s former manager Carlo Ancelotti, and the pair have been spotted eating it on a number of occasions.

A source said: “David can’t get enough of this fine delicacy. It’s got a much lighter and less meaty taste than most other prosciuttos.

He’s dying to get Victoria to try some.”

Victoria Beckham hasn’t eaten a carb since 2003, so it’s fairly unlikely she will be tempted to eat something made out of a fat-laden pig’s arse. If he wishes to ween his wife into the world of pork, perhaps he should try weening her in with some of Luca Toni’s sausages.

Thanks to Vanessa@Kickette for the tip

Disappointing striker is finding life tough in Blighty

Poor old Roman Pavlyuchenko. Not only does he have to put up with the fact that he’s a bit rubbish, but he also hates the country he was forced to come and work in. This morning’s Sun quotes the Russian striker:

“I don’t like English dishes. At the Spurs training ground, the food is modest. All they have there is a simple canteen.

“At the Spartak training camp, near Moscow, the choice and quality is better.

“But since my wife Larisa joined me in London it’s not a problem for me any more.

“She is a good cook and now I eat at home. I’m back to my favourite borsch and vareniki.”

Those unacquainted with Russian cuisine will be delighted to hear that “borsch and vareniki” is beetroot soup with sour cream, accompanied by dumplings stuffed with sauerkraut and cottage cheese. Not only does this sound disgusting, but the dieticians at Tottenham would despair

Blues produce enormous list of demands for away trip

Being incredibly sophisticated gentleman with delicate culinary sensibilities, John Terry and his Chelsea side have refused to let the five star Opera Plaza hotel in Romania cook for the side ahead of their Champions League tie with CFR Cruj tonight.

Full time Chelsea chef Nick Broad, pictured above, will instead prepare meals that do not contain icky animal cooking fats and yucky vegetable oils. The folks at the posh hotel aren’t impressed with the Blues or the 35-page list of demands they issued:

“Then they went through the whole kitchen and threw everything out that isn’t organic.

“This is a good hotel. We’re used to stars and VIPs but this lot think they’re royalty.”

There could be sensible nutrional reasons for avoiding the foreign cuisine, but perhaps the well remunerated players shunned it when they realised the most popular Romanian meal, sărmăluţe cu mămăligă, is known as a “poor man’s dish”.

[The Sun]